Naruto and Sakura: Forced Roomates
by TheCrimsonWarMachine
Summary: A cruel twist of fate would find Naruto temporarily blind, but that only make his life a lot better than it was. NaruSaku.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters.

Summary: A cruel twist of fate would find Naruto temporarily blind, but that only make his life a lot better than it was. NaruSaku.

Naruto and Sakura: Forced roommates.

Chapter 1

The Longest walk

For Naruto it was just like any other day off; he woke up in his small apartment and found himself not only starving, but wishing he had just one person to be with him. As he boiled his water to prepare for his daily breakfast of instant ramen and whatever else he could find, he looked out the windows only to find himself feeling more lonely. It was December and the thin layer of snow reminded him of the holidays that were coming up, holidays that he never once got to celebrate with friends or otherwise. This reminded him of his training trip with pervy-sage, as the most they would do to celebrate the holidays was leave Naruto in the cold while pervy-sage got plastered. Naruto quickly got his mind off of this and finished his breakfast looking forwar to today's training but Naruto found it a little cooler than he expected when he left his house, so he immediately went back inside to retrieve a large orange scarf. Other than his usual attire this was what the 16 year old would wear in the winter months. He proceeded to go to where he would commonly train and worked up quite a sweat before finally deciding that he was done for now.

After making his way back into town he found himself in front of the bathhouse and decided that the cold air, and the fact that he needed a shower after his training, was good enough of a reason to go for a long soak. It only took him about thirty seconds before his perverted mind started to get the better of him. The images of those women on the other side of the wall were just begging him to go take a look. With a snicker and a perverted foxy grin Naruto quickly changed into his sexy jutsu form before trying to make his way into the girl's dressing room. He found it surprisingly empty but was not concerned as he heard feminine voices from beyond the door into the bath.

Naruto began to unzip his usual sweater, when he was absolutely shocked to see both Ino and Sakura walk through the door from the bath, they may have been wrapped in towels, but Naruto still was surprised. His eyes nearly bulged out of his head, but his quickly recovered his expression before they even looked over at him. He turned his head to face where he was setting his stuff down only to hear that the friendly conversation between Sakura and Ino had completely stopped. "Sakura what's wrong…?" asked Ino as she had no clue what was going on.

Sakura just stood there for about two seconds before she realized the incredibly obvious coat that Naruto had forgotten to change when he altered his appearance. Sakura's eye twitched before a look of pure hatred came over her. In the lowest meanest voice she could muster Sakura said "Naruto…!" through her teeth.

"Fuck", was all that went through the head of Naruto who was now sweating bullets. He was screwed and he knew it. A few of the longest seconds in Naruto's entire life passed as he stood there staring at the wall. Ino suddenly caught on as Naruto could now feel the amount of killing intent in the room rise to levels he could only think that the Kyubi was capable of. "Naruto!" Sakura said but this time a bit louder and a lot more aggressively. He gave up; there was no long any use in trying to hide it. Naruto quickly released the Jutsu and turned to face the irate women. Sakura began to walk towards Naruto as he simply closed his eyes and waited for his beating. "I've had a good life" he thought to himself before he quickly remembered that he had a very shitty life and decided not to dwell on this anymore. The following hit could be heard all over the city, almost, Naruto was now lying on the floor facing away from the two angry kunoichi's.

"She restrained herself" he thought as he laid there. "Sakura now stood over him and said "I should kill you, Pervert!" Naruto now climbed onto his knees and nearly through up as he realized what was happening.

"Sakura…" Naruto said as serious as he could.

"What?" Sakura practically screamed back at him.

"Sakura…" again he said this time even more serious.

A few short seconds passed before Sakura asked "What? A little more concerned than angry.

"Sakura I think I need to go to the hospital" Naruto said as he rolled over with one eye popped out of its socket. Ino screamed and ran back into the bath section as she saw his left eye now dangling from where it should be. Sakura just froze as she saw him sitting back on the floor with a look somewhere between stunned and horrified was on his face. "Sakura, help…" he said in a wavering voice on the verge of crying.

Sakura composed herself and quickly took his hand and made him cup his eye trying to stop it from just dangling. "Shit" was all she said after realizing what she had done. She helped him up before telling him "Naruto you need to get to the hospital right away."

"Sakura can't you just fix it?!?!" He asked panicking.

"I could try but, I might mess it up... I've never dealt with eyes before."

"Sakura it hurts… Help me." Was all he said as he stood there.

"I can't… but if you close your other eye that should keep you from looking around and make it hurt less." She said as he complied.

"Ok now what Sakura?" he asked.

"Go to the Hospital!" she said looking at him as if there was no way he could not have already grasped that point. "…you even said that yourself!" she stated thinking he should have already gotten that point.

"…Right!" he said loudly as he turned around then just stopped. "Uh Sakura… I can't see." He let out as he stood there tears running down his cheek.

"Uh, right, just let me get dressed and I'll take you" she said realizing she was now obligated to take him across town the hospital. She rushed over to her things and began to let her towel down before shut abruptly stopped and looked at Naruto still facing the other direction. "No peeking!" she yelled at the boy.

"Sakura I'm blind just hurry up!" he yelled out even more panicked than before.

Sakura got dressed faster than she ever had before. Afterwards she ran to Naruto taking his wrist and began to run with him outside to the hospital, before Naruto suddenly stopped in his tracks yanking Sakura back a little.

"What?" She yelled out just as panicked as Naruto.

"Sakura, it bounces when I run, and it hurts ten times worse than I thought it could have when it bounces" he said starting to calm down a little.

Sakura looked at him holding only eye and closing the other. She shook her head and tried to think of what to do. "Ok, if it gets tangles and looses blood flow he could lose his eye, but if it's just out of its socket then he could keep it even if it took him a couple of hours to get the hospital" she thought to herself, then asked Naruto" Ok, let me see it." Naruto uncapped his eye and let it hang like she asked. "It's ok Naruto it's not twisted or anything so it will be ok as long as we can get it back in within a couple of hours" She literally witness her blonde friend calm down as he reached back up and covered his eye again. "We'll just have to walk" she said and let out a large sigh, both from frustration and relief. "Give me your hand" she said actually sympathetic to her injured friend.

Naruto began to let down his hand from his eye to take her hand, when she forced it back up saying "Tch, Your other hand! You have two!"

"Oh… yeah, sorry" he replied.

"It's amazing" she thought, how someone apologizing to her made her feel like a piece of shit. That is tell she looked at him to see that same foxy smile that he always had.

"It's ok Sakura-chan, as long as I'm with you I'm sure I'll be fine" he said scratching the back of his head.

"HAND!!!" was all Sakura yelled.

"oh, yeah, Sakura-chan" he said as he placed his hand blindly in front of him. Which would have been fine except for he reached perfectly out and accidentally grabbed a hold of her breast. She was shocked, was he really that perverted to do that even when risking loosing an eye? All Naruto thought was whatever he felt was soft before he finally realized what had happened and his face turned an amazing hue of bright red. He immediately felt the back of Sakura's hitting hand across his face and once again fell to the ground. "AHHHHHHHH!!!" He screamed clutching his eye. Which made Sakura sorry for hitting him the second time in the same day.

"Oh, I'm so sorry Naruto!" she said genuinely as she helped him up "come on let's just get you to the hospital so this can be all over."

She got a hold of his hand and began to lead the way to the hospital which she remembered being quite a few miles from where they are. "Aren't you sorry for hitting him?" inner Sakura spoke out. "No!" Sakura retorted. "Liar!!! You hit him and now you wish you hadn't, I mean he may be a pervert but that's not worth losing an eye over" Inner Sakura snapped back. "Fine! Your right, but he still deserved something!" Sakura said to herself. "Yeah, I suppose something like back handing him for an accident was good enough." Inner Sakura came back at her with. "ALRIGHT!" Sakura thought.

"Naruto…" Sakura said out loud.

"Yeah Sakura-chan" the blonde boy whimpered as he was nearly being dragged though the town.

"I'm sorry for hitting you…" she said. Naruto expected to hear her say this, and quickly responded.

"No, Sakura it's really my fault, had I not"

"SHUT UP!!!" Naruto was cut off by Sakura "This is my fault, you didn't punch your eyeball out of your head, just take the apology!" she yelled at him.

"But… I already did Sakura…" he said a little under his breath.

A long moment passed as the two hastily made their way down the street, Naruto now completely lost as to where he was, and Sakura on the verge of tears from what she had done. Sakura started to replay all of the mean things she had done to Naruto in her head finding that she slowly regretted each one. "Why have I been so mean to him? All he ever did was try to be nice to me… and see me naked…" She thought as she let out a long sigh and continued on her way.

"Sakura-chan…" Naruto said.

"Yeah Naruto?" she asked.

"Could we ease up a bit, I mean we are walking a little fast for my… it to not bounce… and your kind of crushing my wrist…" he said as she looked down.

It was now that she actually realized that she was crushing his wrist. She was so used to using her chakra to enhance her strength that she completely forgot to not when dealing with people on a normal basis and relinquished his arm noticing that there was a large red mark on his wrist where she had been holding it. "Sorry, Naruto, I just didn't realize it… here." She said as she now took his hand in hers and slowed down to walk beside him instead of practically dragging him though streets.

"Thank you Sakura-chan" he said

"You're welcome Naruto-k, I mean Naruto" She said as she smiled trying to cheer him up, forgetting to realize that he couldn't see it; Though she also just realize that she also nearly called Naruto of all people Naruto-kun. Inner Sakura jumped back to life at this saying "Really I had no idea we liked Naruto-k… was it?" "What, No, it was just an accident… yeah that's it" she said trying to convince herself that she didn't like the person she stood next to. "Please, he's cute and you know it, just look at him… well ok his clothes show that he really doesn't have the best fashion sense, and they really don't show off his figure, but he's still cute." Inner Sakura said. "What, no, Naruto-ku… AHHH!!!! Naruto! I mean Naruto isn't that!" She said as she tried to get herself some sort of evidence that Naruto was not cute by looking at his face. But try as she may she couldn't see anything on him that wasn't "cute". "Wait! are those real?" she thought to herself looking at Naruto's whiskers. This was short lived though as she only had a brief moment before she walked both of them right into a wall.

"Ow! Sakura-chan are you walking with your eyes closed too?" Naruto questioned.

"Uh… sorry let's go" she said blushing as she helped him get up. "Crap, I just ogled Naruto." She thought to herself. "Come on admit it he's cute." inner Sakura said. "No, come on I like Sas…" she knew she didn't like Sasuke anymore. The entire thought of it made her feel a little sick. He was a selfish arrogant jerk who never really cared for her, and besides he admitted himself that his only goal was to kill Itachi and revive his clan, and if that was the only reason she could be with him then she didn't care to be with him at all. She even realized it was only a crush she had on him. "Ok you know what, your right he is cute." She thought to herself. Realizing she should try to move on she took a mental note of all the boys in the village. "There, is Shikamaru, but I think I would find our relationship troublesome, especially since I think that sand-nin Temari? Was it? molests him, There is Neji… HA! Hahaha! Yeah right, he's got a stick even farther up his ass then Sasuke, Choji… um no, he eats more than Naruto… Or does he? Shino is just too creepy, There is Kiba, but I think he's got a thing going for Hinata, There is Lee…" Sakura shudders at the mere though of those eyebrows.

"Are you cold Sakura? You can have my jacket if you want it." He said after feeling her shiver.

"hmm? No Naruto I'm fine"she said. "Now where was I, Oh, yeah, Lee is definitely out, There's Naruto… yeah but he's stu-" "-pidly in love with you?" said inner Sakura. "What no, he's" Sakura said before getting cut off "Cute?" inner Sakura said finishing her sentence. "No!, I mean Naruto is… ok, yeah, he's ok, what's wrong with Naruto? Nothing that's what, he's just a cute, funny, normal guy!" Sakura thought.

"Sakura-chan can we stop and get some ramen?" Naruto said.

"Sure, Naruto we can… wait, NO! your eyeball isn't even in your head and here you want RAMEN?!?!?" Sakura said shocked… well not that shocked "Pff, not that normal" she thought.

"Aww come on, I can smell it, we can get it to go, please… I'm hungry" Naruto pleaded.

"NO! we are not getting any fucking ramen together until we get your eye inside you face!" She Snapped back.

Naruto instantly realized what she said "together" this word rang through is head several times in what sounded like her voice. He heard her own words say they were going to get ramen together. It was then that Naruto realized that he was walking through town holding Sakura's hand. This instantly gave him a warm bubbly feeling, as he cracked a smile and kept walking. Then to his surprise Sakura suddenly moved real close to Naruto. She grabbed his arm with both hands and put her head on Naruto's shoulder. This instantly made Naruto's face grow redder than it had ever been. His heart was racing and for the first time in his life he felt true happiness.

"Naruto quick act like we are together, I see Lee coming and he's gonna try to… ask me out… I know It's awkward but could you help me out" Sakura asked as she got into the most couple pose she could strike with Naruto.

"Sure Sakura-chan, if Lee kept asking me out I would ask you too… of course I would do it just because you asked me anyway." He said as he went to put his other arm around her but stopped as he remembered he was holding his eye.

"YO! Naruto-san Sakura-san what are your two doing" Lee yelled at the two walking down the street in the cold.

"We're just going on a date Lee, and if you wouldn't mind we would kind of like to be alone" Sakura said.

Looking completely crushed Lee responded "Ok, you two, well I won't keep you… Why is Naruto-san holding his face?"

"Oh, yeah" Naruto said. "We're kind of on our way to the hospital, because my eye isn't really in my head at the moment." Lee just looked shocked.

"You mean-" Lee asked.

"Dangling." Was all Naruto said.

"I wouldn't really call that a date Naruto-san" Lee said.

"I would. Sakura, really likes it when you go all out for her, like when you-"was all Naruto got to say before Lee just got this terrified look at Sakura.

"I think I'll leave you two alone now" Lee said running away.

Naruto and Sakura just stood there watching Lee run off into the distance before… well Sakura watched. Sakura broke the silence saying "Thanks Naruto, I don't think he'll talk to me for a month"

"Uh, I don't think he's gonna talk to you ever now… either that or he's going to gouge his eyes out to try and be with you." Naruto said just before something happened that he wouldn't have expected to happen in a million years. Sakura kissed him on the cheek.

"You earned that Naruto-kun, just don't say another word." Sakura said as she went back to walking with him.

Naruto felt as if he was on top of the world. He just got Sakura to kiss him, and it seemed that she had forgotten to retract from the couple pose they had made to scare off Lee. This was it, the best day in Naruto's life. He's felt Sakura cling to him a little hard before he noticed he say something.

"Hey Naruto?" she asked.

"Yeah Sakura" he said back.

"It's cold and I wasn't really thinking earlier when you asked if I could wear your coat, Is that still up for grabs?" she asked Naruto, to which he replied.

"Yeah Sakura-chan here" he said as he removed his coat and gave it to her blindly. He was wearing a simple black t-shirt underneath.

"Thanks Naruto-k, kun." She said slightly surprising Naruto as he realized she stopped herself, but this time she decided to say it.

Something that Sakura didn't expect was that she actually liked the smell of the coat she was now wearing. Something about the slightly foul odor actually made her feel warm safe, and a little attracted to Naruto, which she now realized really needed a shower. But before she could say anything she felt him get ripped away from him, by someone entirely unexpected. Hinata just earlier today got convinced by Tenten to give it some guts and ask Naruto out. She whipped Naruto around making him lose his grip on his face and let his eye flop right out two inches in front of Hinata's face. They both immediately started screaming as hard as they could, back and forth. That is until Hinata turned around to run away but only made it three steps before passing out and hitting the ground hard. Sakura could help but bust up laughing at the spectacle as she grabbed Naruto's arm and continued walking him to the hospital. Which as they turned the corner was now in sight.

"Hey Sakura-chan?" Naruto asked.

"Yeah Naruto-kun?" She said realizing she liked the sound of that.

"Thanks for helping me out today, I really couldn't have done it without you." Naruto said gratefully.

"You're welcome, oh yeah, um we're here." She said as she realized that his comment was not just because they were coming to the end of their journey, this was because she knew that he could not see, so she felt the comment would have had to have just come from his heart.

She took him insides and signed him in. But she couldn't bring herself to say goodbye after getting him there.

"Hey Sakura-chan?" Naruto asked.

"Hmm? What is it Naruto?" She asked back.

"Earlier you said we wouldn't get ramen together until we got my eye fixed, um... I was wondering… If-" Naruto said, but was cut off by Sakura.

"I wouldn't have it any other way Naruto-kun" She said.

Naruto smiled as he was taken away by the doctors who seem to be very disappointed that they had to do anything with this kid again.

"I'm gonna wait here ok Naruto" she spoke to him. " It should only take like thirty minutes to an hour so I'll just be right here." Naruto smiled back to where he though she was, giving a thumbs up to the wall as he followed the doctors, and quickly disappeared from Sakura's vision. She waited there patiently just as she said she would, about thirty minutes later they told her she could visit him. After making her way to the room he was laying down in she realized that he was fast asleep.

"Why is he asleep? That should have only taken a mild pain killer to be able to put it back in. Right?" she asked the doctor.

"Trust us, we learned a long time ago, if you want to do anything with that boy you have got to knock him out" the doctor said with a chuckle. "Relax he'll be awake any minute now."

Sakura walked in to see the blonde laying there on his back drooling, and she thought it was kind of cute how he looked asleep. The doctor left the room and Sakura sat down next to the sleeping boy. She looked at the white bandage that now covered his left eye and was sorry for what she did. Sakura waited patiently for about five minutes before she started playing around with his hand, "Gosh Naruto your fingernails are all messed up." She said to her elf when she remembered that she thought his whiskers weren't just marks. She quickly brought her hand to his face finding that they were indeed real whiskers. She gave them a slight pull and made them fluff out. She was surprised at how cute that Naruto could be when he was quiet. She ran her fingers along the whiskers and just basically played with them until she realized that each time she agitated them a little too much she would actually make Naruto start to giggle a little. "I guess he must be ticklish" she thought to herself as she continued playing around with the sleeping boy. That is until he started to wake up and realized Sakura was messing with his face.

"What are you doing?" Naruto said sleepily. This caused Sakura's face to turn bright red as she just realized that she had practically been molesting his face in his sleep.

"Oh, um, nothing" she said trying to get out of it "Oh, let's go get some ramen what do you say Naruto?"

"Sakura-chan… you mean like a date?" Naruto asked just like he always did.

Sakura though of her usual response and decided to try a different approach "Sure Naruto-kun, I guess we can call it that", this cause Naruto to make a grin which she had never seen before, one that only preceded a sound louder than she had ever heard before.

"YEAH!!!" was all Naruto said.

Sakura on the other hand "Quit Yelling! that was loud. come on lets go."

After leaving the room they talked to the doctor who said that Naruto should be fine so long as he didn't get jarred to hard for the next week, and that he should keep the bandage on his left eye. He was fine with this until the doctor told him no training and no work until his eye got fixed, but seeing as it was so close to the holidays anyway he eventually just considered it a vacation.

After leaving the hospital it was still about mid day and Naruto's gut was really beginning to tell him that lunch was needed. As him and Sakura began to walk towards Naruto's favorite place, Naruto asked a question that he thought might get him hit again, but thought it was a good joke " So, Sakura-chan, wanna hold hands?"

She broke into laughter, but decided to grab his arm and scoot next to him after she finished. "You're lucky it's cold or I would have turned you down." She said smiling.

They reached Ichiraku's and sat down, Sakura ordering something that Naruto recommended, and Naruto his usual twelve bowls, one of each flavor.

"Fifty yards" the person said standing on top of the roof a ways down the street.

"Can't you show manners on a date Naruto? You just hog the bowls down without even caring what you look like." Sakura said trying to get him to slow down.

"Wind speed five miles an hour bearing west" the person said.

"Naruto remember when I said you earned a kiss from scaring off Lee?" she said catching Naruto's attention "I think it was worth more than one." Sakura said as she leaned towards Naruto's mouth to give him a thank you that he would remember.

"Pull back, and FIRE!!!" Konohamaru said as he fired his slingshot at the pink haired girl trying to take his boss away. The stone flew through the air and just as Naruto and Sakura leaned in for the final inches, THWACK.

"AHHHHH!!!!!! My Other EYE!!!!!" Naruto screamed out as he fell to the floor.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters.

Summary: A cruel twist of fate would find Naruto temporarily blind, but that only make his life a lot better than it was. NaruSaku.

Notes to you: Hey guys thanks for the support, you guys are great, this story is anticipated to have at least 8-9 chapters, I'll try to update every day, but it might be every two days. Also there is a good potential that this story could run longer,

Chapter 2

First night

"You'll be blind for a week" was all Tsunade said as she wrapped Naruto's other eye in bandages.

"WHAT?!?!? You mean both eyes?" Naruto questions as he sat on the bed.

"Yep, the strain on your left eye was just too much from being out of socket too long, and the damage done by the rock to your right has left it severely scratched and bruised" she said holding her head with one hand. "What am I gonna do with this kid?" Tsunade complained in her mind.

Tsunade simply ignored Naruto who was busy asking a million questions without waiting to hear an answer as she turned to Sakura and was stopped when she saw that Sakura was wearing Naruto jacket. Of course she had seen this when she first walked in but didn't realize it till she had finished tending to Naruto. Tsunade tilted her head to the side and smirked internally as she thought that her two favorite younglings may have finally made some headway.

"BAA-CHAN! Are you listening?! I don't think I can even find my house like this, what am I gonna do about food? Do I get one of those looky-eye dogs, or will someone help me out?" Naruto kept questioning until something clicked in Tsunade's mind at that last comment.

"Sakura come with me" Tsunade asked as they left the room. They walked out closed the door behind them, and could see through a window that lead into the room where Naruto was. They watched him through the window in his pitiful attempts to follow them as he stood up and flailed his arms wildly in front of him almost immediately knocking things over. "Sakura, I have a mission for you." Was all Tsunade said.

"Hmm, what is it?" Sakura replied almost chuckling at Naruto who was now trying his hardest to put everything he knocked off the counter back up.

"Well that's new" Tsunade thought, "Sakura would have just been angry that he had knocked everything over before… this may work better than I thought" She mused to herself before telling Sakura the details "As you can see Naruto is practically helpless even when he can see… and now he's even worse…" She said watching Naruto placing the different objects he had knocked onto the floor into his mouth in an attempt to try and taste what it was so he could put it back right. "…right, anyway, he has no chance of making it a week without some help, so… you're gonna be living with him." Tsunade said to the dismay of her apprentice.

"WHAT?!?! You can't be serious!" Sakura exclaimed in a semi-horrified state.

"Yes, I am, now look there is no point in arguing because it's not negotiable, It's not just because he probably couldn'y even get himself a glass of water with his eyes closed, but if the Akatsuki were to attack… Just look at him he's defenseless, at least you would be able to get someone's attention." She said watching him as he had now gotten himself wrapped up in the bandage tape used to put the bandages over his eye.

"Your right… but why me?" Sakura asked now about to die laughing from Naruto trying to pull the tape out of his hair and cursing, before just ripping it all off and throwing it at where he though the garbage can was, missing it by four feet.

Tsunade's usually calm personal was now starting to crack as she couldn't even help but look at how pathetic Naruto really was in his current state. "It's because nobody else could do it, Kakashi would show up late and do nothing but read Jiraya's filth. And Yamato would secretly hate me if I did that too him. After that the only other person really strong enough to fight off Akatsuki is you." Tsunade said making Sakura realize just how far she had come since she started training with Tsunade.

"wow… I never thought of it like that." Sakura said getting used to the feeling of being one of the strongest people in the entire village.

"Plus, I don't think he would listen to anybody else, Oh! And on that note, you can't hit him." Tsunade said watching Naruto finally getting the room barely straightened out.

"You want me to live with Naruto for a week, and not hit him?" Sakura said looking at Tsunade like there was no way that was possible.

"If he gets hit too hard his eye could pop out again, and then we might have to start this whole thing over,… you're just going to have to restrain yourself… Relax, it's only a week, you'll do fine" Tsunade said finally getting Sakura to surrender.

"Fine." Sakura said reluctantly as the both reentered the room.

"Naruto, meet you new roommate, Sakura! She volunteered to help you out while you can't see" Tsunade said getting death stares from Sakura. "Oh, and… there's a window from this room to the hall." Hearing this Naruto's face flushed as red as a tomato.

"You mean…" Naruto said as he dropped his head in front of himself embarrassed.

"We saw everything" the women replied in unison.

"fuck…" was all Naruto said under his breath.

Sakura once again found herself at the ramen bar, which she didn't particularly care for. It was barely getting to be dark now, but she couldn'y find herself able to work up enough courage to try and resume the moment from earlier, Especially since Tsunade was eating right next to them. She was now staring at how Naruto somehow became even more of a sloppy eater when he couldn't see. But it was Tsunade that broke the silence.

"Naruto you should really stop calling me grandma, you don't want to inherit this bad luck of mine, now would you?" Tsunade said, but instead of making Naruto crack a smile like she had hoped, it only made him stop eating.

"Baa-chan… you have no idea what bad luck is." Naruto said before continuing on his fourth bowl.

"??? How has he not realized it yet?" Tsunade thought before telling Sakura "Oh, Sakura, why don't you run home real quick and grab the things you need, we can meet back at Naruto's apartment before I turn him over to you, O.K.?"

"Yeah, that's a good idea sensei, I'll be there in like thirty minutes" Sakura said as she stood up and walked off saying "bye" as she left.

Just as Sakura had turned the corner Tsunade grabbed Naruto and pulled him close whispering into his ear "What are you retarded?" she considered this for a moment before continuing "Sakura is now living with you, and only you for a week and you act like it's a punishment?!?! You're gonna have to try a lot harder to get her than that."

This struck Naruto like a ton of bricks, Instantly making him give a huge foxy grin. "Baa-chan. I had no idea you wanted me and Sakura to get together?" Naruto responded a little surprised.

"Just don't mess this up, oh, and if you hurt Sakura I'll personally kill you" Tsunade said with a matter of fact kind of demeanor.

"Nah, I think she would kill me before I ever got the chance to see you again… hey, why does Sakura-chan hit me anyway?" Naruto asked wondering for the first time why Sakura would actually go out of the way to make Naruto behave.

Tsunade let out a heavy sigh and look at Naruto trying to look straight in his eye but only caught a glimpse of the bandages. "Naruto if you haven't figured that out yet then I'm afraid we are going to have to put you down for being too stupid." Once again Tsunade said in the same matter of fact way.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Naruto questioned back.

Tsunade just looked at him and thought "Duh" to herself before she heard Naruto talk again.

"No, seriously what is it supposed to mean, I'm so confused?" Naruto said pulling his hand up to the bottom of his chin and cocking his head to the side to try and figure out what her comment meant.

"It's because she LOVES you!" Tsunade replied baffled at how Naruto could be that dense.

"What?!?!, there's no way Baa-chan, I mean like yeah, but LOVE? I mean if she loved me then why… wont… she ever go… on a… date with me…" he said slowing down to realize that she actually had just earlier today.

Tsunade just let out another large sigh before saying "Come on Naruto let's get you to your house."

"We still have like twenty five minutes to get there, what's the rush?" Naruto asked.

"Though I'm sure you're a proper young lad… ha, I mean… uh, I can't even keep a straight face…" Tsunade said failing at her courtesy by breaking out in laughter. "ok, look, are you sure you want Sakura to see you apartment how it is right now?"

Naruto thought back to his apartment they way he left it, all the images came flooding in as he remembered the dished were piled out of the sink and, the table and several other places, the fridge was full of half eaten ramen and other rotten things, his laundry was everywhere, and he also seemed to recall losing a jug of milk about a week ago, even though he specifically remembered setting it on the floor next to the toilet. "Oh, yeah I guess your right…" he said to her "Thanks for reminding me" he said though his thoughts questioned "Where is that fucking milk?"

They arrived at his house very shortly, and began to clean the house, even though Naruto was about as helpful as a rock in his current state.

"Why am I doing this, I'm the freakin' Hokage!" Tsunade thought to herself as she managed to get the place from looking like a total disaster into just an ordinary pigsty. "Naruto you owe me." she said as she watched Naruto laying on the ground feeling around for things to pick up. "This place is still a fucking mess, I mean didn't your parents… fuck, I mean…"Tsunade said before regretting saying those exact words.

"It's ok, I know you think I would be more bitter about it but if I got mad anytime I ever had to hear anything about parents it would just be too much trouble." Naruto replied as if it didn't affect him at all.

Tsunade was a little surprised at how grown up of a response Naruto gave. But she was unable to continue this line of thought as Sakura knocked on the door.

"Coming" Naruto said as he walked to his closet and opened it, while Tsunade walked to the actual door and let her in.

Sakura came in set her bags down, and looked around at the house. "Wow, this place looks like shit, Tsunade you couldn't have at least made Naruto clean up a little before I got here?" she said.

They both just sighed in return, before Tsunade said "I should really be going, that mountain of paperwork has to be done before I can go home and Shizune is already going to chew me out for not being in the office half the day, Oh, and Naruto?" She asked getting his attention "Best behavior, bye" she said as she closed the door with both young people waving in her direction.

"So, Sakura, wanna get some dinner?" he asked.

"We just ate half an hour ago, you can't seriously be hungry." She replied.

"Aww come on I just wanna go to…" he said as he realized that there was no way that Sakura wanted to go to Ichiraku's a third time that day with him. "Fine I'll just eat something here" he said giving up going out. Sakura, on the other hand, just looked at her accommodations for the next week and thought. "There is only one bed."

"Hey Naruto, do you have like an extra mattress someone can sleep on?" She asked.

"No, why?" he replied not getting at why she was asking.

"…because where am I going to sleep?" she said

Naruto now found himself disappointed that he could not tell the difference between the flavors of his ramen supply while he was blind, but still listening to Sakura said "the bed of course."

"… and where are you going to sleep?" she asked

"the b…" he finally got why she was asking and knew there was no way he could pull getting her to sleep in the same bed with him off. "the floor" he said in a let down expression. But the blonde boy didn't expect what happened next.

"No Naruto, you take the bed you're injured" she said

"No I couldn't let you take my cold hard floor, just take the bed" he said back caring for her more than himself.

"No you take it." She said a little more aggravated that he was being so resistant.

"No you!" Naruto practically yelled back.

"… look I need to take a shower anyway we'll talk about this when I get out." She said letting the aggression slowly fade from her voice as she talked. "I'll be out in a little bit."

She entered that bathroom and Naruto continued trying to make his instant ramen only to find that he could figure out where Tsunade put his water pot. Gritting his teeth he, crushed the bag of ramen in his hand thinking "no matter, dry ramen is good too" he sat down at his table eating the crumbled noodles for about five minutes till something his body told him that he needed to go to the bathroom, bad. It was like it had just snuck up on him, he had piss and there was no time to argue. He found his way over to his bathroom door and knocked. "Hey Sakura?" he asked.

"What?" came her muffled voice from behind the door.

"I have to go to the bathroom" he said a little urgently.

"Just wait, I'll be out in a couple minutes." She said.

This was the problem with eating fifteen bowls of soup in a single day. You have to go to the bathroom, but when you eat them all back to back… It just happens to come out all at once.

"I don't think I can! I REALLY HAVE TO GO!!!" he yelled now almost dancing in front of the door.

A few moments passed before she finally responded. "Fine, but if you peek your dead."

"right Sakura I would never… Um, I'm blind" he said remembering it himself.

The door unlocked and he heard the shower curtain close before she said "Come in." he entered the bathroom and made his way to the right to where he remembered the toilet being. On his left was the shower which he could hear running. He unzipped his pants and started to go.

"Hey! What the?!?!" Naruto said as he felt the urine splash everywhere. "What's going on?!? Sakura did you put the toilet lid down?!?!" He asked trying to stop himself as the spray was going everywhere.

Sakura opened the top of the curtain side near Naruto keeping her body covered to look at the person she was speaking to "Yeah Naruto I did I'm a girl remember, we do thaaa…" she said slowly stopping talking as she now had a perfect view of Naruto's penis. "Nice" inner Sakura said, while Sakura responded "yeah" to her inner self.

Naruto stood there confused as to why she had stopped talking, a few seconds passed before he realized what was going on. After giving a severe blush he turned to his right in an attempt to run away, running straight into the wall to his right. He had done this with such force that not only did it knock the towel rack down soaking all of the towels in piss, but also making Naruto fall backwards into the shower. Slipping down he tore the shower curtain off the rail and bumped Sakura causing her to slip, she grabbed the only thing she could to try and stay up, but sadly the hot dial for the shower only turn on as she fell down on top of the boy.

"HOT!!! HOT!!!! HOTTTT!!!" the both screamed as they slipped back and forth trying to get up. Sakura managed to get out of the spray when she found her face touching Naruto's manhood.

"WAAAAAA!!!" she wailed as she threw herself backwards her legs slipping from underneath her as she fell directly on her back into the puddle of urine.

Naruto on the other hand managed to stand up and force the shower curtain into the path of the scorching water, and yelled "Turn it off!, Hurry up I've got it to stop spraying!"

Sakura Stood up, turned the shower off and just wanted to kill Naruto. This became apparent very quickly as she said "Naruto" as pissed off and evil as she ever could. This made Naruto drop the curtain and just about crap his pants as he heard how mad she was.

"sorry sorry sorry" The boy repeated as he slowly backed out of the room knowing that in a few short minutes, when she got out, he was probably going to die.

He closed the door behind him and zipped up his pants, his only thought was that his only chance was to run away. He made his way to the door and stepped outside, only to turn back around and come in when he realized all he would accomplish by running would be getting lost, soaking wet in the snow. "Crap" he said thinking he would have to face this. "Ok, I'll do something really nice, and then she will forgive me, ok, so… nice… nice… I could make dinner? " he though as he remembered he couldn't even make ramen a few minutes ago, and that she was still probably not hungry from after they ate. "I've had a good life… crap not that again, I've really gotta find something different to say when I'm about to die."

"Your fucked kit! And no, I can't think of anything to get you out this one" he heard coming from his head.

"I know, and if she doesn't kill me Baa-chan will, so I guess I'm just gonna have to die this time." He replied. "how come I don't have anything cool to say before I die, at least Sasuske can say "I regret not killing my brother" but me… what do I have to say "I died because of a toilet seat?" that just doesn't sound cool." He talked to himself.

"It's a good day to die!" the nine tailed beast said

"You can say that again" Naruto said

"No, I mean you can say that before you die." It said.

"Oh, hey yeah that's a pretty good one" he said as he walked to his dresser and changed out of his wet clothes. "Where did you come up with that?" he asked.

"I said it when I killed you dad." The monster replied.

"Not cool fluffy, not cool." He said.

The Monster was about to chew him out for calling him fluffy, when he decided to shut his mouth because the bathroom door just opened.

"It's a good day to die" Naruto said aloud.

Sakura scowled at him for a few short moments but eventually remembered he couldn't see her. "Not yet you don't." she said not as angry as when Naruto left her but still quite annoyed. "I should kill you, but… seeing as it was an accident" Sakura said walking up to him. "I won't" she said calmly as she crushed his foot with her heel. "At least not till I feel you inside me" inner Sakura said, making Sakura reply "right… I mean no!?"

Naruto didn't even wince as he knew something was coming, and when all he felt his foot get smashed he was thankful. All he could bring himself to do was say "I'll take the floor"

"YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT YOU WILL!" Sakura said as she watched him limp to the closet to take out a blanket. He lied down on the floor and started to drift off. Sakura shook her head and turned off the light before going over to Naruto's bed and getting into it.

Five minutes passed before Naruto broke the silence. "Hey Sakura?"

Sakura rolled her eyes into the back of her head before responding with a huge sigh and saying "What?"

"Could you get me a glass of water, I tried earlier and I can't do it by myself?"


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters.

Summary: A cruel twist of fate would find Naruto temporarily blind, but that only make his life a lot better than it was. NaruSaku.

Naruto and Sakura: Forced roommates.

Chapter three

Notes to you: Why aren't there enough hours in the day? Seriously, alright so part of this is my fault, seeing as I'm taking 22 units in college this semester. Insane, maybe, but who in their right mind is not insane, (or in my case, who in their wrong mind is not perverted, and or insane/ a workaholic) which I suppose is still quite odd seeing as how lazy I am. Ok enough about that, I'm sorry guys but I'm going to have to cut back, once a day, may just be to difficult for me to do. So I'm going to try to push it to once ever two days, also, when my temporary break is over I may have to cut back even further. sob why can't I find more time. Oh and this chapter is a bit more fluffy, but still funny in yet a different way than the other two. Love and kisses guys.

Day 1

Naruto awoke to the sound of Sakura saying "It's ten o'clock wake your lazy ass up Naruto" as the bathroom door closed behind her. He found himself a few feet from where he had slept the night before and realized that he was partially under his bed. As he lye there he realized that his hand had found a hold of something in his sleep. He pulled it out from underneath the bed and sat up. CRACK!!! Naruto felt as his back was out of place from sleeping on the hard floor.

"What the hell is this?" he said giving it a shake. A few seconds passed as the gears began to turn. "Oh my gosh! It's the milk" he said and thought that Sakura would think less of him should she find it. He began to think of different place to stash it before she came out. "Ok, if I put it back it could break open, the trash will look weird with a whole jug of milk in it,"

The door startled Naruto as he heard a loud knock coming from the front door. He quickly finished thinking that a jug of rotten milk in his fridge would look best should anyone find it and placed it accordingly before trying to answer the front door, but found that he could only hobble over there as his back hurt him that much.

"Hello Naruto-san" the person standing outside said.

Naruto cocked his head to the side trying to figure out the voice, before asking "Lee? Is that you?"

"Yes Naruto-san, is Sakura here?" he asked.

"Yeah, but why?" asked Naruto puzzled.

"Gai-sensei told me that even though you and Sakura are dating that I should not give up, and should endeavor to go out with her anyway?" Lee replied.

Naruto was a little stunned "How the fuck can you have that much balls?!?!" He thought to himself. "That's like impossible, you're supposed to run away and try again later! Not this!" he continued in his head. Before he broke out in an evil smirk. "Oh, ok Lee, she's busy right now so I'll tell her later for you ok?" Naruto told Lee.

"That's why I like you Naruto-san you always welcome a challenge" Lee responded.

Naruto thought to himself that Lee may have been the only person that would have ever worked on, before he asked Lee an obvious question. "Hey, Lee have you been training today?"

"Of, course!" the green clad ninja replied

"Well it would just so happen that I have a jug of special yaks milk that is supposed to increase the effects of training ten times" Naruto said as he made his way to the fridge. During which his back gave out loud crack, making him feel slightly better.

"Wow" Lee replied

"Here take it I already had one, see how you can feel the power it has, even though it's been in the fridge it's still warm." Naruto said snickering internally.

"Yeah, that's amazing!" Lee said wide eyed.

"Yeah, yeah it is, there is one downside though" the blonde haired boy said playing his expressions perfectly.

"What is it?" the other boy replied.

"You have to drink the whole jug and it tastes really bad" Naruto said.

"If it will increase my training than I will gladly drink it all, thanks Naruto" Lee said as he opened the bottle and drank the entire gallon of rotten milk. Naruto heard this and internally laughed an evil laugh on the inside.

"Okay keep on training hard Lee, and I'll see you later" he said about to break up.

"bye and thanks Naruto" he said as he left.

Naruto closed the door and began to laugh "That was freaking AWESOME!, as if drinking a gallon of milk in an hour didn't make you through up, but a gallon of rotten milk?!, he's gonna shit out a kidney!!!" he said before relapsing into laughter. "that ought to teach that son of a bitch for trying to pickup Sakura while we're dating… wait huh?" he thought as he heard the door to the bathroom open and Sakura walked out.

"Who was at the door Naruto" Sakura asked.

"It was Lee, I can't believe the balls on him though he told me he wanted to ask you out." Naruto said a little surprised about this still.

"What? really? So what did you do?" she questioned back.

"I told him I would tell you then fed him a jug of rotten milk" the boy said forgetting that the only reason he was hiding the milk in the first place was so that she wouldn't find out.

"But… there wasn't any milk in the fridge?" Sakura said thinking about it.

"Um, that's because I found it under the bed." He said with a grin.

"Oooh, you're evil" Sakura said playfully snicker at the thought of Lee drinking the jug. walking up to him. "Listen Naruto, I was thinking that we could just forget about last night, and try to get along."

"What part, because there was one part that I don't wanna forget" the boy said.

"What one was that" Sakura asked

"The part where I scarred Lee away and you said-" he said trying to make sure their attempted kiss stayed between them, instead of fading away into nothing.

She put his finger to his lips to shush him and said "You mean the part where I was gonna do this" she continued to pull Naruto's head into a long kiss, as she let one of her hand fall to the side of his face to play with his whiskers. They released from the kiss but she kept on playing with his whiskers.

"mmmm that feels good" Naruto said as he stood there rubbing her hand with his face in between his face and his shoulder.

"Well maybe if you wouldn't slick them back I would touch them more often." she said then removed her hand before saying "Now get dressed Naruto-kun I have to go see my mother in fifteen minutes and we have to stay together so hurry up."

"I don't think I've ever met your mom" Naruto said.

"You'll like her, she's nice" Sakura replied while getting her coat.

Fifteen minutes pass.

"GET AWAY FROM MY DAUGHTER!!!" Mrs. Haruno yelled as she beat Naruto relentlessly with her purse. He just covered his head and ran around in circles trying to avoid getting hit before Sakura was able to stop her mother from tormenting the boy anymore than she already had been.

"Mother STOP IT!, He's Defenseless!" Sakura said firmly and resolute. "You're the one who always said be nice to every when you meet them because first impressions matter most"

Her mother stood the looking at the with squinted eyes trying to measure him up for real "but sweety don't you know he's the…" she said silencing herself remembering the law.

"No, Mom, he's not, he just contains the Nine tailed fox inside his body, he's like a prison warden, and the fox is his prisoner." Sakura explained.

"Sakura, the law?! Be quiet!" Her mother said back.

"Yeah, it's ok I've known about that for like four years now, so that law doesn't technically exist anymore." Naruto said, "and besides, do you really think the Hokage would personally assign her assistant to look after me if there was a threat." Naruto asked rhetorically but still sounded defensive.

Mrs. Haruno took a step closer to Naruto, who stepped back at the sound and covered his head again making Sakura's mother realize just how timid this normal boy was. "Wow, I never thought that this kid was like that, he just seems so… human" she thought to herself before realizing that she now had to apologize for beating someone for no reason. "Sakura are you sure he's in control?" she questioned her daughter.

"Mom! Yes already, he's even saved my life and this entire village several times, plus he's actually really nice once you get to know him." Sakura said.

After a few minutes of talking to get to formally know each other the three continued on with the plan that Sakura and her Mom, had come up with. The proceeded to go to one of their favorite restaurants which Naruto had never actually heard of before. It had been a couple moments after ordering their food before Sakura's mom made the mistake of asking Naruto about his childhood and upbringing, to which Naruto gave her the long version.

"And then I was beaten for simply walking too close to some guy who said I killed his sister, so to sum up yeah I have no family… At all, my closest friend abandoned the village, and for the first twelve years of my life I was shunned and beaten on almost a daily basis." Naruto said finishing up his story.

"I am so sorry" Sakura mom" The way I acted was inappropriate, please accept my humblest apologies" Sakura's mother said as she thought that even she herself mistreated this boy who in his entire life really hasn't done anything worth what he has gotten.

"Don't worry yourself, If I hated everyone that hit me then Sakura would be my worst enemy." Naruto said causing Sakura's Mother to glare daggers at her daughter.

"Really now, how many times would you say that Sakura has hit you?" the older women asked looking at Sakura like she deserved ten fold for every single hand she placed on him. Sakura started sweating bullets as she thought that her mother would kill her if she knew the truth.

Naruto started "let's see if I can remember" Sakura crushed his foot under the table to get the message to him that it was NOT ok that she know that information. "One…" Naruto squeaked out trying not to show the pain he now felt from his foot. Naruto deftly tapped in Morse code "That was the same foot" but what he failed to realize is that the foot he tapped that onto was not Sakura's. And unfortunately for him Sakura's mom had also known morse code. Keeping her wits about her instead of saying anything she waited as Naruto tapped more. "sorry, I didn't know you didn't want your mom to know the truth"

While above the table Sakura's Mom made a bold move "So, have you two ever gone on a date together?" she asked.

Under that table Naruto felt his other foot got crushed again, this caused him to reach back over and tap some more. Above the table all was silent as Naruto tapped out "Quit crushing my foot, so I'll take that as a no, I shouldn't tell her that we kissed."

Sakura's mother's face turned a little red before she said "hold up on that answer, I have to use the ladies room" as she left both Sakura and Naruto let out a loud "Phew"

As soon as she was out of sight Naruto said "That really hurt Sakura-chan that really hurt, why did you crush my foot again after I asked you not to?"

"What are you talking about?"

"What do you mean what am I talking about i tapped in Morse on your foot?" Naruto said confused.

"It wasn't my foot" Sakura responded with real question in her voice now.

Naruto's face turned a horrible shade of red as he faced Sakura and said "OH SHIT! I just told your Mother we kissed!" Sakura who was taking a drink at the time nearly coughed up a lung when she inhaled some of the liquid after hearing Naruto say that. Sakura just starred at the boy wide eyed as her mother came and sat back down. The tension was incredible, every person just sat there with the straightest possible face they could muster, Mrs. Haruno started to say "I-" before she was cut off by the sever saying

"Foods, here!" the server commented in a pleasant voice, while passing out the food. "Is there anything else I can't get you folks?"

Naruto brave enough to venture forth raised a hand toward her signally her off and said "I'm fine thanks you" The server turned her attention to the two women and cocked her head waiting for their answer.

"I never got an answer to my question" Sakura's mother said.

The tension thickened, the situation was a time bomb, if anything happened next it would trigger the explosion. And unfortunately for Naruto it was him, all he tried to say was that the soup smelled good, but all he got to was "Th-" before Sakura twisted his wrist into a submission grip causing him wince in pain.

All three members of the part started yelling at the same time, Sakura screaming "How could you do something that stupid?!?! This is all your fault, DO you have any idea what you have DONE?!?!?"

"SORRY SORRY" he yelled back.

"DON'T Treat your boyfriend like that!!! All he ever did was try to be considerate of you!!!" the girls mother yelled in Naruto's defense.

"HE'S NOT MY BOYFRIEND!!! ARE YOU?!?!" The younger women screamed.

"I WOULD KIND OF LIKE TO BE?!?!" he yelled back.

"SEE!!! EVEN HE THINKS YOU SHOULD BE!!!" the older women screeched.

"FINE!!! YOU'RE MY BOYFRIEND!!!" Sakura yelled then pulled Naruto by his collar into a lasting kiss.

The entire restaurant just stared at the group as the two kissed even giving it a little tongue and the mother just looked on. A few seconds passed and the newly formed couple broke apart and sat down along with the mother. The server just turned around and walked off in a complete state of shock.

"The soup smells good." Naruto said continuing where he had left off.

"Yeah they have really good soup here" Sakura's mom said.

The restaurant went back to normal as did most of the conversation for the rest of the meal. Except for the fact that the couple now acted as a couple instead of just being friends. As they left the restaurant they found themselves in a normal conversation, and Mrs. Haruno found that she really did in fact like the boy that her daughter had chosen.

"We should take a picture" Sakura's mom said with a chuckle. "That way in a few years we can look back and laugh at the most awkward meal I think anybody has ever had"

All of them laughed as they made their way to the Haruno residence and took a picture of the three of them with both of the girls giving Naruto bunny ears, but as he took a copy of the picture and placed it in his wallet he had no idea of this. They took the picture in the living room before they sat down to a friendly conversation. It wasn't long until the approaching holidays were brought up.

"Naruto, what are you doing for Christmas?" Sakura's mom inquired.

"Probably the same thing I always do, eat ramen till I nearly though up then go to bed" Naruto said with disappointment in his voice.

"Non-sense your spending it with us, I can't have my daughter's boyfriend left alone for the holiday again" The women said with compassion in her voice.

"Th-Thank you, I-I've never had anyone have me over for the holidays, I-I, just, THANKS!!!" He yelled while giving her a huge hug.

"Skaura sweety could you come help me in the kitchen, I'm gonna make some tea?" Sakura's mom said as she left the room.

"Ok, mom," Sakura said as she got up to follow her "hold on I'm just going to help her Naruto-kun"

"Ok, I don't think I could help much anyway" he said as he leaned back into his chair.

Sakura's mom was busy getting the tea ready when she started to talk to her daughter "Well that, was definitely the weirdest way I've ever heard of introducing your first boyfriend to your mother?"

"um… yeah" Sakura responded a little embarrassed.

"Don't worry about it, he's a nice boy, and more importantly I can tell you really like him."

"See, I told you he was nice. He's also really strong too, ever since he went on his training trip with Jiraya he came back with all sorts of new power."

"Yeah… wait! WHAT?! That boy was trained by that pervert?!?!" "Sakura you can't go out with him! he's only got one thing on his mind I can tell you that much if he was trained by that pervert!"

"He's not like that… um…" Sakura said thinking back to how he was blinded in the first place.

"Um what?" Sakura's mother wondered.

Sakura surrendered, she knew he was perverted, but even she was a little bit so that was no reason to stop seeing him now, and it also helped that she didn't have a choice. "ok, fine, he is a little perverted, that's kinda how he got blinded in the first place, but the honest truth is he liked me way before he left to train with Jiraya. And it doesn't matter what either of us want, I still have to stay with him for six more days no matter what."

The older women nodded her head, before saying "You finish up here, I'm gonna go have a chat with our guest" she then went back into the living room where her guest awaited.

"We need to have a word with each other boy." She said as she sat next to him.

"Sure, what is it." He wondered.

"I know you like my daughter and there are just a few things I would like to clarify" the wolmen said in a sort of aggressive over protective parent voice.

"Oh crap." Naruto thought as he sat there, "I knew this was gonna happen," he continued thinking as he let out a huge sigh.

"First off, I like you, so with that you are welcome in my house" she continued with her speech.

"I kinda already figured that as I'm sort of… in… it already" he replied.

"Second of all, you're not allowed to touch her" The women said in a more firm voice.

"What you mean like, at all? Because that makes getting back to my house kind of difficult, See this is why I asked Baa-chan for one of those looky-lou dogs" Naruto rambled on just talking.

"What… no, shut up. What are you stupid?" Sakura's mom said finally getting the boy to quit talking. "Listen what I'm trying to say is" she pulled him real close so only he could hear it "If my daughter gets pregnant, then I'll kill you." This made Naruto gulp and he was surprised at just how evil this lady could sound when she was protective.

"Yes Ma'ma…" He said terrified.

The women's demeanor changed as she said one last thing "… at least not till you're married anyway" This caused Naruto's face to turn red as he now thought that there was no way he could ever get out of this relationship without having to die.

"If I mess this up in anyway one of three women will kill me, if I go to slow Sakura will be hurt and then Baa-chan kills me, if I go to fast she might get pregnant and the her mom will kill me, and the only way out of marriage is supposed to be death so…" Naruto thought to himself thinking saying his new catch phrase for when he's about to die might be appropriate to say.

"I was killed by a toilet seat…" he said not realizing it was the wrong one.

His girlfriend's mom just stared at him until breaking the silence with "I'm not sure what to say to that… Were you dropped on you head as a baby?"

"AWW, DAMNIT!!! That's not what I meant to say… crap, maybe I was." He said completely embarrassed for sounding like a retard.

"That would explain a few things." Sakura added as she walked into the room with the tea.

They left Sakura's house a bit later than they had expected and it was now dinner time, and after about half the day of Naruto begging to go get ramen Sakura couldn't fight it anymore so even though it was a few minutes out of the way they still went.

"Ok Naruto I'm seriously confuse, I can't even figure out what your were trying to say when you told my mother that, you had been killed by a toilet seat?" Sakura asked genuinely confused.

"Can't we just call me stupid and forget about that?" he said trying to change the topic.

"No, if you're gonna be my boyfriend I wanna hear it." She said in a kind of serious but still caring way.

"hmm, ok, so I was trying to look cool by saying this new death phrase I have, because I was thinking back to all the people who threatened to kill me while I was dating you, not that the threats were made while I was dating you, but that while I am dating you they might kill me-" he began to explain before being cut off.

"I'm lost, why were you thinking about people trying to kill you" she said as she cocked her head to the side trying to figure this out.

"Because your mother came in and was all like "I'll kill you if you have sex with my daughter"" he said just as confused as she was a couple of minutes ago.

"What even brought that up?" She said realizing this was her own fault for bringing up that he had been trained by Jiraya.

"I DON'T KNOW, one second she was all, I like you, you're welcome here, come over for Christmas, and the next she was like "I'll cut your balls of in your sleep" ok, so, she didn't actually say that, but you get the point, and then-" the boy continued but was cut off again.

"I still don't see what this has to do with a toilet, you know what, your right it was just easier to call you stupid." Sakura said realizing he was right after all.

The blonde was beating himself up on the inside for being right… which he thought was quite odd until he happened to remember that the girl of his dreams, was now actually his girlfriend. He was about to say something until Sakura cut him off saying. "What did I tell you about your whiskers" in a playful voice.

He fluffed them out and turned to her direction before giving a big grin. She reached out and grabbed a hold of them softly and used them to drag him into a long kiss, this one was different though, unlike the others which had been rushed or violent and awkward, this was taken slow and done right. When they broke Sakura said "I like having you as my boyfriend."

"Fla, gla ch ha Ha doh fa" was all Naruto was able to say in response as he could no long seem to say any other words.

After the walk back to Naruto's apartment they thought that it had gotten fairly late and decided to turn in for the night, All Naruto could think about was that he was going to have to sleep on the floor yet again, and that his back would once again hate him for it.

"You take the bed, I had it last night, and don't think I couldn't tell your back was killing you today." The girl said trying to force him into his own bed.

"No way, we've already been over this, I won't let you." Naruto said thinking there was no way he would let her suffer the pain that he endured today.

"Alright look we'll just share" She said making Naruto grin "please, don't get any funny ideas it's head to foot" saying this caused the boy to nod thinking that this could work, and possibly save his life.

"Ok Sakura-chan, we'll give it a shot" he said as he got in and scooted all the way to the far side of the bed, followed by Sakura who got in the bed the other way. "Night Sakura-chan."

"Good night Naruto-kun" she said as she closed her eyes trying to get some sleep.

About ten seconds passed before the girl had smelled her new boyfriend's feet. "Gosh!, your feet reek, this isn't gonna work… here" she said as she turned around in the bed to lye right next to Naruto. Whose heart began to race as he felt her breath make its way down his chest as she placed her head on his shoulder.

"mmm, you're warm, mind if I sleep like this" she said as touched their bodies together and intertwined their legs.

Naruto was now about to lose it, "Oh shit, this is awesome, I can totally feel her all over me." He thought before he heard something talk back,

"**Fuck her!**" the fox said

"yeah, that sounds like a good idea, NO! bad fox I don't wanna die, at least not yet." The boy said trying to stop himself from getting any ideas

"**Just do it, she won't really kill you, she'll probably just force you to marry her when your eighteen.**" The monster said.

"Hmm, no, she sounded too serious she would probably kill me." He thought back as a response.

"**COME ON!!! Just do it, I've had to wait sixteen year for this and your just gonna chicken out, FUCK HER!!!**" he heard roared throughout his head

Sakura felt Naruto's breathing start to speed up and become irregular, causing her to ask "Is something wrong Naruto-kun?"

To which he responded "I DON'T WANNA DIE!!!"

Sakura rolled her eyes before shutting his mouth with her lips, after feeling him calm down she broke their lip lock and said "shut up, my mother is not going to kill you… I won't let her… and besides, that's my job" she gave him one last kiss before they both drifted off to sleep.

Somewhere deep in the village hidden in the leaves a resident taijutsu master sits on the toilet screaming "Why is this happening?!?! OH NO NOO NOT AGAIN!!!!! AHHAHAHAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! WHY DOES IT BURN!!!!!!!!"


	4. Chapter 4

Notes to you: HI! Thanks for the great review guys…. I love you, but not enough to have actually worked on this last night. Instead I slept, or at least stayed awake on the couch for hours doing nothing, thusly to finish this in hopefully record time I have brought in a co-writer. The Azure War Machine has lent me his help, and to this I am thankful, That is, if sitting on your ass playing Mass Effect all night and then later proof reading it is considered co-writing. Now don't go thinking this is going to change anything, as I still have final say as to what goes in it, and the fact that we practically think the same way. So, without further adieu I present the fourth installment. Oh, And our co-writer would like to know if you liked his additions to it , so where specifics are hard just give an overall chapter review.

Chapter 4

The Talk

Sakura awoke to a rather interesting feeling as she found herself trapped under Naruto's weight. Though this was something that may have been a problem, it was not the most pressing matter. What was however was the fact that Naruto had a case of what is commonly referred to as morning wood. Pressing itself into her outer thigh to be precise. "**Cha! This is good!" **her inner self let out, "Yeah, but it is a little uncomfortable… maybe if it were someplace else." She thought, but decided to wake him anyway.

"Um, Naruto…wake up… you're kind of… stabbing me." She said while shaking him gently.

"Hmm…" was all he said in response before slowly drifting back in to his slumber land.

"Naruto you're… um…" she said getting a little more of a reaction out of him.

"hmm… what…" he managed out before going back once again to sleep.

"Naruto, it's…" was all she got to say before being cut off by the sleeping boy.

"Mmm… Sakura don't stop…" he said in his sleep.

"Great now he's having a dream. Naruto." She said with a bit more aggression.

"What is it?" he said finally coming to.

"It's… It's… YOUR PENIS!" she said shouting as he started to give little thrusts.

"What?! Sakura?!?! Aww!!" he said as he attempted to both roll and push off of her when he realized what was happening.

Unfortunately for them both, their legs were still far too entangled from the night before, and as he rolled and forced his way to the edge, he found her straddling him.

It was a nice sunny day as Kakashi was strolling his way over to Naruto's house to give Sakura a break, when bumped into none other than Sakura's mother, quite literally in fact as he was caught up in one of his novels. Knocking her to the ground he, kindly helped her up.

"Oh, I'm sorry Mrs. Haruno" he said helping her gather groceries that he had knocked out of her hands.

"It's ok… Mr. Kakashi, was it." She said in return.

"It's just Kakashi actually, and this is probably just a coincidence, but I was actually on my way to see your daughter and another student of mine." He said in his same unenthusiastic tone.

"hey, that is kind of weird I was just on my way to deliver these groceries to her and Naruto" she said finding the coincidence strange.

"Oh, so you've met Naruto then." Kakashi said.

"Yeah, poor boy, I've hear he has nothing in his house but instant ramen to eat." She replied.

"I'm afraid that's by choice actually." He said in return, the two now making their way towards Naruto's residence. "It would seem I'm supposed to give your daughter a break for some of the day, Why don't you go with her, while I watch after Naruto" He continued, as they now made their way up the stairs to the apartment.

"Break? I'm afraid we might have to tear them apart Kakashi, you see they're a couple now." She said in a sort of overly happy way.

"Really? Now that's someth-" He said probably the most surprised he ever sounded in his entire life, but was cut off as they approached the door to muffled screams.

"YOUR PENIS!" They heard come from the inside of the door, causing them to look at each other when "What?! Sakura?!?! Aww!!" followed up as her mother broke the door in after hearing this. She looked with daggers in her eyes as she saw her daughter straddling her new, soon to be missed boyfriend.

"What is it, what's going on?" Naruto said as her tried to look around.

"Sakura Haruno!" her mother yelled as she looked at the two, trying to leap forward but being held back by Kakashi.

The irate woman glared at the man, before he pulled her back and said "I think it's time that I had a talk with Naruto." With this the woman seemed to ease up before he continued "Don't worry I'll straighten him out. Sakura, why don't you get dressed and head out with your mother, we can meat back up at 3:00 for a late lunch, and then we'll trade back."

"Grrr, Fine! But you better make sure he learns his lesson Kakashi!" The mother snarled back, still incredibly angry.

Sakura got dressed and left with her mother, a few minutes later Kakashi and Naruto did the same.

Kakashi and Naruto:

"hew, um… where do I start… Um you see… sigh when a man loves a woman…" Kakashi said watching the boy who apparently had never heard this speech before from how closely he paid attention. "holy crap… you've honestly never heard this before?" he said completely stunned.

"No, should I have?" Naruto said.

Hearing this Kakashi let out a huge sigh. "Well you see, it's like this…"

Sakura and her mother:

"Now, you see, when a young lady comes of age" the older woman started.

"Oh, not this MOM!" Sakura said in return.

Kakashi and Naruto:

"She just wants your penis." Kakashi said as if it were the only piece of information that the boy would ever need for the rest of his life.

"WHAT?!?! No you have it all wrong I wasn't trying to have sex with her." He said trying to defend himself.

Sakura and her mother:

"No, Mom, he wasn't trying anything, it was just an accident." The young woman said as they made their way to breakfast.

"Don't lie to me, I can tell what was on that boys mind… And look, we need to talk about protection." Sakura's mom said even feeling a little embarrassed herself.

"Oh,Gosh!" Sakura said wishing that this was not happening.

Kakashi and Naruto:

"I'm telling you it's true." The copycat-nin said with resolve, as they walked down the street.

"Maybe for you, but we're not like that, there's something more there." Naruto said trying to convince him.

"Oh! So you don't believe me then?" the older man said in his attempt to sway the younger.

Naruto scratched his head deep in thought. "…I'm gonna need a second opinion." He said.

Sakura and her mother:

"look it's just a simple jutsu, all I'm asking is that you learn it." She said as she remove a scroll that held the information for a birth control jutsu.

"I'm a medical specialist, I explain how that works to other people, you don't need to tell me how to do it." Sakura said as they left the restaurant.

Kakashi Naruto and Iruka:

"The way I see it is that if she loves you, then she probably wants you" Iruka said

"I can understand that, but the problem is knowing how to tell when the time is right." Naruto replied.

"I see where you're going with that, but I disagree." said Kakashi.

"What makes you think I can tell you that? We're gonna need more help" Iruka said feeling like none of them had known anything about the opposite sex.

"Huh, it's eleven already?" remarked Naruto.

Sakura and her mother:

"Mom, thanks but I really didn't need to hear all of this." Sakura said gratefully.

"Don't tell me that, it was better to make sure you knew than to end up pregnant" The older woman said.

"MOM!" the girl yelled embarrassed.

Kakashi Naruto Iruka and Gai:

"You came to the right guy, I know all about how to please a woman, and I know exactly what they want." Gai said with full confidence.

"I'm not wearing a green jumpsuit." Naruto said back in a flat voice.

"Why not their airy, they have good agility, and the women love 'em" He said back to the boy.

"Please, like you know anything about women" Iruka said realizing that it was no use trying to get information from him.

"I know lots about ladies" Gai said in his defense.

"Oh, really, when was the last time you even had a date Gai" Kakashi chimed in.

"What's this? A challenge, Kakashi?" Gai said with full vigor in his voice.

"You think you can get a date before me?" the copycat-nin asked.

"Guys, I think we're getting off topic" Naruto said a little confused as to what was happening.

"A CHALLENGE IT IS KAKASHI!" Gai said ignoring the boy, and giving a thumbs up with the gleam off his teeth.

Sakura and her mother:

"Well, we should start to head to where Kakashi said now, it's getting late" Sakura said as they left.

Kakashi Naruto Iruka and Gai:

"So what were the terms of this again?" Iruka asked.

"The loser has to go on a date with whoever the winner chooses" Kakashi replied, still reading in his book.

"GUY'S IT'S THREE WE HAVE TO GO!" Naruto yelled.

"Fine Kakashi, the challenge starts tomorrow, and if you win I'll date the person you choose ten times!" Gai said with his full power of youth.

"Right here! In Icha Icha Tactics! See chapter four and I quote "Women only want your penis!"" he said still rather unenthusiastic but somehow shouting, "And that's all you need to know"

"Well that's what I was trying to tell you in the first place." Gai said.

"Uhhh… You guys haven't told me anything" Naruto said in despair. "Come on we really have to go!"

Sakura and her mother:

"Your age is a hard one Sakura, Right now, I'm sure all you want is penis-"

"SHUT UP!!!, please don't ever talk to me about this again!" Sakura yelled then dropped her head in shame.

Kakashi and Naruto showed up early, to Sakura's surprise, only thirty minutes late. To which they sat down for was now an early dinner.

"So did he learn his lesson?" Sakura's mother asked

"yeah… I guess I did?" Naurto said extremely confused.

"Oh, trust me he won't make the same mistake twice" Kakashi said with a smile underneath his mask.

"alright, if you say he won't then I believe you, But if he tries anything again he knows what's coming" Sakura's mom said spiking her voice at the end in anger.

"Well, I actually have to go" Kakashi said as he quickly made his way to the door. "Remember what I told Naruto" He said as he left.

"Where's he going?" Sakura asked.

Naruto lifted his shoulders in the classic "I don't know" pose and the meal continued, the rest of the evening was fairly normal, but Naruto definitely felt hostility coming from his girlfriend's mom and things progress, especially when they went to leave.

During the walk home Sakura began to talk about her day.

"OH, MY GOSH! My mother just kept telling my about how to deal with boys, and tried to tell me about…" She got a little embarrassed but continued. "Sex all day long. be glad you don't have parents because that was awful"

"Sakura, I DIDN'T LEARN ANYTHING!!! Hours of three grown men trying to explain to me how things "work" and I think I'm more confused than when I woke up this morning." He said even more stressed than she was.

"Who were the other two?"

"Iruka and Gai, They're just as bad if not worse than Kakashi though." He said in a matter of fact sort of way.

"You listened to three grown men who haven't had a girlfriend between the three of them for years? If you ask me you're doing better than them, not only do you have one, but you happen to be spending then night with her tonight." She said getting a little seductive near the end.

"That's the first thing that's made sense all day" he said as he pulled her into a kiss, it was the most romantic kiss to her eye she had ever had, before she pulled his face down and corrected his kiss.

This continued for a few seconds before they were broken apart by a familiar sound.

"That's not how you punish Naruto for acting perverted Sakura." Ino said as she looked at the two kissing in the street.

Sakura turned around to shoot a particularly mean gaze at Ino who was snickering about her going out with Naruto.

"What do you want Ino?" Sakura said in a fairly mean tone.

"Oh, nothing" she said as she stepped forward, "Just to see that you actually ended up with Naruto! It's funny when you think about it, You and Naruto! HA! I can't believe you ended up with him, FOREHEAD!"

"INO YO-" Sakura said as she was stopped by Naruto who grabbed her and pulled her back.

"You can make fun of me all you want Ino, but" he said stepping forward before letting his hand swing wildly in front of him in an impressive backhand to the soft face. He turned toward the fallen figure and began to yell "THIS IS IT!!! THIS IS WHERE I DRAW THE LINE, I'M GONNA TELL YOU THIS JUST THIS ONCE SO LISTEN, WE'RE TOGETHER NOW AND IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT, TOUGH, NOTHING YOU CAN EVER DO WILL CHANGE THAT!!!! SO DON'T YOU EVER COME NEAR US AGAIN!!!!"

He heard her get up and run off into the distance crying when a voice caught his attention.

"Um… I'm gonna go make sure she's ok" Ino said as she walked away.

"HUH?!?! Wait, WHO THE FUCK DID I JUST HIT!?!?!?" He said puzzled.

"Let's just say Hinata probably won't talk to you for a long time" Sakura said feeling a little sorry for her.

"Awww, that's just not right" He said realizing that being blind really sucks. "I mean, now I really feel bad, I fucking hate these eye patches" he said a little sad.

"I wouldn't say that… the way I see it they were the best thing that ever happened to us" she said with a little sweetness to her voice. "Come on, lets go, I've got a surprise for you when we get back."

Naruto's expression instantly changed from one of sorrow, to big grin as he heard her words, and quickly after which found himself heading home. When they arrived she did indeed have a surprise, after stripping him of his shirt she layed him down to a nice long back massage. A few minutes in Naruto broke the silence by saying. "hmmm, I don't get it why are you being so nice to me? I did after all just beat one of our friends for no reason."

"That might be, but… it wasn't meant for her now was it. This is sort of a thank you for standing up for me. And I figured your back might still be bothering you from the night you spent on the floor."

"Mmmm, thanks, ha, you know what?" he said with a chuckle.

"Hmmm?" she replied.

"After today… I certainly don't wanna have sex." He said calmly.

She layed down on his back and whispered into his ear. "You can say that again." Before they both slowly drifted off to sleep.

A gathering of most of the male Shinobi took place as Kakashi, Iruka, Gai, Lee, Chouji, Shikamaru, Kiba, Shino, Neji, Yamato, and Sai all found a place in a park to talk.

"Wait, So How the hell are we supposed to get women?" Iruka said.

"Beats me" Chouji said

"I get raped, but I don't really think that counts" Shikamaru chimed in.

"Why the fuck were we giving Naruto advice when he's doing the best out of all of us?" Gai asked honestly confused.

Most of the meeting Sai sat in silence listening until "Hmm, Naruto's doing the best… but that makes no sense… He doesn't even have a penis."

"Well, I don't know about you guys, but for Sakura's love I would gladly gouge my eyes out!" Lee yelled as he stood up with his index finger pointed to the sky.

To which guy stood up and shouted " I WILL ALWAYS SUPPORT YOU LEE, HERE TAKE MY KUNAI!!! SPRINGTIME POWER OF YOUTH GO!!!"

"GAI-SENSEI!!" exclaimed Lee, his voice filled with admiration, as tears streamed down his face.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

The challenge

Notes to you: I'm back baby!!! Ok so here's the deal, I'm not abandoning the story I'm just busy. So I'm pushing the releases to once a week. I know sad for cries. But I still love you so it's ok (Isn't it?) I had both my friends the saffron and azure war machines help me on this on, but just a little on how some dialogue went and some plot stuff. Hope you like it. Sorry if it's a little raw. I just didn't want to keep it from you any longer.

Sakura awoke finding herself facing her rather loudly snoring boyfriend who she felt looked extremely cute laying next to her. She playfully raised an arm and brought it up to his face to once again play with his whiskers. She stroked them gently slowly stirring little twitches from the boy as he lay there. She raised her other hand to his hair and began to run thought it gently until she began to softly agitated his flesh behind his ear. With this she noticed something very odd, with every touch to that area he seemed to move his leg a little. "Oh, my gosh, I wonder if" she said slightly scratching the area, and noticed him start to shake his leg exactly like that of a dog. "huh, that is so cute, I had no idea the fox would affect him that much."

Rousing from his slumber the boy found that he quite liked the feeling of the scratches to behind his ear. "Hmm" he moaned before coming too and saying "yeah, that's the spot, ooooh don't stop."

"Naruto-kun I had no idea you acted like this" She said playfully.

"Hmm? What? Sakura?!" he said stopping his leg shaking and realizing how he had been acting, he blushed and clearly did not want her to know that he did this.

"It's ok Naruto, I like it, it's cute she said giving him a kiss Which seemed to abolish any form of shame he felt for his previous actions, before taking a long look at him, "I miss your eyes" she said.

"Sakura-chan I miss seeing anything about you. You don't get it do you, I finally have one of my greatest dreams come true and I can't even open my eyes to see it. The happiest moment of my life will be when I can open my eyes to see you." He said back at her, trying to be both romantic and serious. A combination that was difficult for him to pull off.

She caresed his cheek saying "That's sweet Naruto, now wake up… you go take a shower while I make breakfast." Then proceeded to get up and leave her boyfriend in his bed. He layed back placing his arms behind his head and breathing in deeply. A few moments passed before he got up and did as he was told.

After making his way into the bathroom, he relieved himself making sure that the toilet seat was indeed up before he went. While standing he found himself flashing back to the first time he had to take a crap while blinded. Sitting on the toilet wasn't the problem but after a few minutes he began to realize what was. "Um, how do I know when I'm done wiping" he thought as he was there. He pondered his situation, "Well, I can't see it, hearing is useless here. I think no matter what it would smell bad, and tasting is definitely out… so all that's left it… touch…" a few moments passed before something clicked in his mind, "I've got it, Shadow clones" he said making the familiar hand sign. One appeared across from him and reached out to touch the paper before disappearing. "Nope, not yet, he thought as he continued wiping." After what seemed like far too many shadow clones than what was needed he emerged from the bathroom sweating like he had just run a marathon before collapsing on the bed.

"What's wrong with you" Sakura said.

"Lets just say that was one hell of a poop" he said before snapping back to reality, and getting into the shower, "Why did I say poop, what am I five" he said to himself turning the water on.

Outside the bathroom Sakura had finished breakfast and was setting the table when she heard. "Sakura can you get me some clothes, I kinda forgot to get them before I went in here." Come from the other side of the bathroom door.

"Sure, just hold on a second." She said as she made her way to his dresser. "What the… everything is orange… even his boxers," she said as she lifted a pair with two fingers, "Well maybe his closet" but she was only able to find a slightly different than normal version of his same coat at best. "this is pathetic… I've got to get him some new clothes." She said taking his slightly thicker coat out after looking out the window to see that it was snowing slightly, and assembled the rest of what she was to have him wear. She continued to knock on the door which opened and she forced the clothes through.

"Thanks" he said from the other side.

A few moments later he came out with a little bit of an uneasy look on his face.

"These aren't my normal clothes" he said a little irritated,

"You can't wear the same thing everyday, and besides you really need to get some different clothes, all you have is orange… not that it doesn't look good on you, it's just, it gets a little old after a while" She said in return.

He sat down at the table and found his plate and utensils and began to eat his breakfast, while listening to what she said before responding. "Hmm, no Sakura I really like what I wear-"

He was unfortunately cut off "It's not an option, I don't care if you wear it once every few days, but I won't let you keep wearing the same stuff everyday." She said making him get a

little defensive.

"Awww, come on, I don't want to…" he said but was a little unnerved by her silence as he figured out their was no way he could win this. He crossed his arms and turned his head to the side before he said "fine…"

"Thanks for being so cooperative" she said then continued. "While we're out anyway, Why don't we go on our first official real date" she said sort of grinning.

"But, I thought" The boy said but was cut off

"Getting shot in the eye sort of ruined the moment, so I wouldn't exactly call that a first date." She said back to him.

"Ok, but what would we do" he asked curiously.

"I don't know, how about… we could go for a walk in the park… nah, you couldn't really see anything."

"we could go to a museum." He said thinking of his same problem. "Or… we could go to the top of the Hokage monument and… look at the view…" He, finished under his breathe.

"this is really hard" She said with a hint of frustration in her voice.

"We could just stay here and make out all day" he said with a snicker.

"That might be fun" Inner Sakura commented "No, I don't think I want our first date to be that, we've got to go out and do something." she said before replying back to herself in her head "No matter how fun that might be."

"Wait, I know something we can do" He said and continued eating.

They left the apartment, and continued on with Sakura's plan to change her boyfriends appearance, even to his dismay, and soon found themselves in the shopping district.

"lets try in here Naruto" she said as she dragged him along.

"Please can we just forget this, I like the way I look and-" But he was cut off.

"Just humor me" she said a little exasperated at his attempts "and besides, you might find out that you like it when you make me happy" she said seductively and she brushed his whiskers.

Getting the point immediately that this was not about him, but that it was what she wanted he said back "If it's to make you happy then alright."

"Good now lets stop in here" she said pulling him inside.

After a few moments of selecting things she had him change and come back out for her to take a look.

"I like it, it looks good on you" she said with a little snicker in her voice.

"What is it?" he said still opposed to the idea of his new garb.

"Nothing it looks good" she said trying to cover up.

"What color is it" he asked nervously.

"…blue" she said.

Her pause said everything, The boy knew that she was a bad liar, but had no idea that she sucked that bad at it. He game off a troubled expression as he heard some walk close to him and grabbed out at the person catching their arm.

"What color is this?" he asked the stranger.

"Pink" was all the woman said back. Hearing this cause him to turn his head towards Sakura.

"No" was all his answer.

"Fine, but you've got to at least try these on" she said back to him.

Realizing he had yet to let go of the person he had one more question for them. "\Thanks for your help, but do those ones look ok?"

"Yeah, they're fine." She said still a little \weirded out that she had just been grabbed by some stranger but when she was let go she felt a strange sense of worth after having helped the blind and walked off.

He took the clothes from Sakura and walked into the dressing room after changing, he found the new clothes to be quite comfortable, but still not what he was used to.

"How do I look?" he questioned.

Sakura looked him up and down and walked around him. "You look really handsome" she said getting a smile out of him. She like the way that the blue jean like pants fit him, she found them a little baggy but not so over exaggerated as to detract from the rest of his outfit, or to hide his figure too much, the blue over-shirt placed over his normal black tee complimented his pants and made her think that it would go really well with his eyes. Staring at him Inner Sakura commented "CHA! And it really makes his ass look great too!" with this she nodded.

"…I really wish I could see it" he said a little mad that he still wasn't sure what he was getting himself into.

"We'll just have to buy it and you can see it later" after saying this and purchasing the clothing she practically had to force him to wear them out of the store after that. He gave up at fighting it after he had left the shop and found himself still walking around the shopping area.

"Why are we still here?" he asked.

"Oh, you think you can get away with getting new clothes and not have me go shopping while we're out." She said getting him to realize that this was far from the last time that this was going to happen.

"Great" was all he said.

After finding a small shop which she had found something that she had thought looked "cute" she pulled him inside and went to change. While standing there in the women's clothing store he thought that he was a little out of place, turning around to try and leave the store he found his way out relatively easily but happened to bump into some one outside where he intended to wait.

"Sorry" he said.

"Naruto? Is that you?" Sai said a little confused as to his garb. "You look different"

"Sai? Yeah, it's not by choice…" he said a little depressed. But it was at this time that something had caught Naruto's ear, the familiar sound of a Christmas jingle. This forced a light to come on in his head. "Oh, crap I need to get Sakura and her mom a Christmas gift" he said to himself.

"Interesting, a gift?" Sai said a little perked up at the thought of trying his hand at gift giving to try and make friends.

"Yeah… Hey! Sai you gotta help me, please help me find them some gifts." He asked nearly begging hoping it was the only way he could get him to help.

"I'll do it" was all he said flatly back.

After a few minutes of wandering around Sai pointed out a store.

"I think she like something from there Naruto" the black dress boy said to his now blue clad counterpart.

The entered inside and found themselves trying to find what might have been a needle in a haystack. Not only could Naruto not easily pick a gift for the opposite sex, but to do it blind, and though Sai made it neerly impossible.

"This looks like something the ugly dog would look good in" Sai said.

This was a pick at Naruto's emotions that he was not ready for, but then thought that he should have expected it in the first place. "Sai, remember when Sakura told you not to talk bad about Sasuke in front of her."

"Yeah?" he asked at Naruto's question.

"You're about to die and don't even know it" Naruto said.

"What do you mean?" he said still confused as to what Naruto was getting at.

"If you talk bad about Sakura in front of me… I'll shove a rasengan up your ass." He said a little angry.

"Understood." was all that he said back.

"So what is it?" he said grabbing it, feeling its soft silky texture.

"It's pink clothing" he said back still unenthusiastic.

"Perfect, your better at this then you thought Sai" Naruto said back happily.

After purchasing the item and getting it gift wrapped they were off to find something for Sakura's mom. "But it wasn't long before Naruto had to go to the restroom and asked Sai to stop. He was starting to get used to being blind, and could now direct himself more easily by sound alone. He found it quite interesting how he could tell where walls were by how much they absorbed sound, also that by simply listening in an uncrowded space he could usually avoid bumping into people or objects. He made his way down the hall and found a door to the restroom which was empty from the sound of it. Using his now more accurate sense of direction and hearing he made his way to where the urinals should be and finished his business. He proceeded to go and wash his hands in the sink which he found quite easily.

Anko was in the shopping district for a rather unknown reason to her, other than the fact that it was the quickest route to her house from the Hokage building, but it was now that she thought that she had to take a short trip to the bathroom. She made her way down the hall and opened the bathroom door to see none other than Naruto standing there washing his hands in the sink. "Oh, sorry, wrong bathroom she said turning around to entered what she thought was the correct bathroom when she saw the male sign across the way. At this she turned around and kicked the door in "NARUTO GET YOUR ASS OUT OF THE WOMEN'S BATHROOM!" She yelled at him.

"What?!? Aww, I mean" he said lowering his head in shame as her made his way to the door.

"You're lucky you're blind or I would have had to have gotten real nasty" she said rather angry but looking at his eyes made her feel that it was an honest accident. As he walked past her she was a little interested to see him in different than his normal clothes and thought that they really suited him quite well. Perhaps too well. As he made his way out she looked down and gave him a hard slap on this butt. "Nice ass, kid!" she said making him just about freak out and spin around in a defensive stance with a completely flush face. But nothing more came as she just entered that bathroom and closed the door behind her. At this the boy moved out back to meet with Sai.

"What was that about" he asked not quite curious but still confused.

"Oh," he said scratching the back of his head" I sort of just pissed on the wall"

Shrugging it off both shinobi set out on their quest to find yet one more gift before the one clad in black started to talk.

"I need more information" He said

"Huh?" the blonde got the point before continuing "oh, about Sakura's mom? like what?"

"her age." The other said back.

"I don't know, Ive never seen her, just older I guess." He stated a little confused.

"Older huh?... lets try in here" he said as they walked into the store.

After walking around trying to pick something out it was Naruto who broke the silence this time.

"Hmm" he said as he moved his hands over what seemed like and intricate and unique vase. "How about this Sai?" he said as he felt it.

" I think she will get much use out of it." Sai said in his flattest tone.

Once again getting it gift wrapped, they left the store and were not but a couple of steps back towards where Sakura had been left when they heard her scream.

"THERE YOU ARE!!!" she said "Phew! I was worried there that something might have happened to you Naruto, you could have at least told me you were leaving, And whats with ditching your girlfriend anyway?"

"Oh, I had to go shopping for presents for you and your mom" he said holding up the packages.

" Naruto I have to go, I'm a little late anyway, let me know how things turn out" Sai managed to be interested but also flatly as usual.

"Sure later Sai" He said waving in his direction hold his presents. With that Sai left.

"Seriously, I know you were just trying to be nice to me, but you should have said something" Sakura said a little relived and disappointed as well.

"I'm sorry, but…" he said "I didn't know you would be that worried about Sakura-chan"

"Of, course I would be, Not only is it my mission…" she said making him not so happy that she would think of her mission most of all. "but I can't loose my boyfriend only three days after we got together" She said then gave him a kiss completely abolishing his previous assumations.

After their trip shopping the made their way to the park to which the boy said "Trust me it's gonna be worth seeing this" when arriving they had bumped into a couple of their friends

"If it isn't Naruto" Shikamaru said standing next to his cubby counterpart.

"You've been making quite the commotion lately havn't you" The puggy man said.

"What's that supposed to mean?" the blonde said honestly trying to figure it out.

"First off Neji said that Hinata won't quit freaking out since you bitch slapped her" The shadow wielder said.

"For no apparent reason" his friend now eating a bag of chips added.

"I know… I have to apologize for that" he said a little sad about that situation.

"I haven't seen Lee since he was borrowing Gai's kunai to stab out his eye for you Sakura" Shikamaru stated as he continued.

"Which apparently has started a trend as after seeing how well it went for you, a lot of the men in the village have been showing up in the hospital with eye related injuries." Once again his friend following up on his words.

"huh glad I'm not working this week" the pink haired girl said with a laugh.

"And you managed to make all the men in the village question how to get women… Which has

lead to this." He said finishing his speach

"All right Kakashi I'm gonna get a date before you!!!" Gai yelled from the middle of the park.

"What's going on?" Sakura asked,

"Oh, they're in another one of their challenges, it's to see who ever can get a date first" he blonde friend replied "It's kind of why we're here."

"That might be kind of boring"

"Aww come on, I wanna stay and… listen, I wanna see who wins."

"But-"

"Kakashi might have to show his face" he whispered into her ear.

This made her think for a moment of all the time they had spent in the past to try and see his actual face. "I'm not missing this" She said as she sat them both on a bench to watch the contest.

"Where did everybody go?" Chouji said as he looked around the park. "I could have sword there were a lot more women around her a moment ago"

"You mean before the green suited bragger screamed he was looking for a date a minute ago" his troubled friend commented. "Ok, we actually have to go, so see you later you two."

"bye" they said at the same time but slightly staggered.

The clock struck twelve and the contest was off. Gai ran towards the nearest women he could find screaming at the top of his lungs "Will you go out with me" with this panic struck the village as almost all the women fled the areas that he entered as he screamed. Women everywhere threw their arms into the air and ran at the sight of him, out of fear that he might take one of their attacks as an acceptance to his proposition. The other contestant just looked at him and shook his head, before sitting back on the bench taking out his book and reading.

Time passed as the couple sat on the bench observed the challenge, but after about thirty minutes Sakura had gotten a little bored. "It that it, I mean watching Gai is a little funny, but it looses its charm quickly."

"Maybe your right, we should go"

"I've wasted one whole day trying to see his face before, and I'm not about to stop now"

"But I don't even have that going for me."

"I suppose your right… but you do have one thing"

"What's that-" he said before being cut off by Sakura pulling him into a kiss by his whiskers.

"Sakura what the hell are you doing!" The Hokage yelled at her apprentice "I told you to stay with Naruto day and night, and instead I find you hear making out with some… Holy crap!" was all she managed to utter out at the end as this was the first she had heard of the pair's coupling, and she would have noticed it was him earlier if it hadn't been for Naruto's new clothes. Speechless she just sat their starring at the two who turned to her direction.

"I…you…" Tsunade said then shook her head regaining her composure " When did that happen?"

The two teens blushed before Sakura responded "Two days ago"

"congratulations" she said in return still fighting off the shock of what she once thought to perhaps be impossible. "So things have been going good then." She stated.

"Not exactly" the both of them said back.

It was at that moment that Sakura had heard the familiar jingle of an ice cream salesmen and thought that she had wanted some. "Ooooh, Ice cream, You want any you two?" Sakura said.

"No I'm fine," The older woman said.

"I would… Chocolate please" Naruto chimed in.

"Ok, I'll be right back" she said as she walked towards the vendor.

"Take your time… I have some questions for Naruto" she yelled as Sakura walked away.

As soon as she was far enough away for her not to hear Tsunade spoke "So how did you pull that off?"

"There was a lot of screaming, and good soup" He said in return.

"I bet…"

"Then her mother was all like trying to kill me"

"it's the fox, it killed her husband, and she probably blames you for it" she said

"What? No, really? I didn't know that… but no she was only mad at me when she found Sakura straddling me."

This made Tsunade raise an eyebrow and let out a certain "Oh really?" she said in a suggestive tone "I didn't know you two would move that quickly"

"what? NO!" he said a little flustered by her comment. "It was an accident, that's all"

"ok, ok, Naruto, I believe you" she said easing off the topic "Is there anything else you wanna tell me? Because she's on her way back."

Naruto jumped at the sound of this with an instant response "Shes a nazi!, she won't let me eat ramen more than once a day, because "It's not healthy" She makes me shower everyday, and she won't even let me wear the same underwear twice in a row, Please you have to talk some sense into her, she's crazy, I can't even tell what clothes I'm wearing right now Please!" he said as fastly as possible.

"Sounds like everything is going great for you two" the hokage said both cutting him off and shushing him down as Sakura came closer.

"Here you go Naruto" she said handing the cone his way. "Are you two done talking?" she asked getting a nod from the older.

Whereas the blind one found himself raising his hand slightly in an attempt to try and get his previous words to do something, but instead just said "yeah" as he though that she would probably just agree with her apprentice before him anyway.

It was at this point that Shizune showed up trying to chew out her boss for not dealing with situation that she was supposed to quickly enough.

"What are you doing?" the elder of the assistants said. "Get out there and stop Gai from terrorizing the town! Here he comes now." She said pointing a finger to him as he came jogging up.

It was at this very moment that the copycat-nin interjected by looking up from his book and saying. "Hey Shizune! Wanna go out tonight?"

"Sure" she said in response sending the green clad one to his knees crying.

"How could I lose!!!!" he said bawling right in front of them "Alright…" he said composing himself. "Who do I have to date?"

"Her pig" was the masked mans response as he pointed to his future date.

This almost instantly got a surprisingly disappointed "oink…" from said pig.

"I guess that settles that" the eldest woman said aloud.

The night continued not a one of them wanting to miss seeing the green ninja humiliate himself by dating a pig just watched (say for one) as he did just that. He was surprisingly complete in all aspect of the date sense, He fed it, danced with it, took it on a long walk hand in hoof. It was coming near the end of his little adventure when he found himself in front of the door to its house when Naruto said something that everyone would regret. "Don't forget to kiss your date goodnight!" he yell in his direction.

The man looked back with a gleam in his eye and held up the pig "OH I WILL!" he yelled. "I'll even do it ten times!!!...With TONGUE!!!" he finished before turning on the pig to the absolute shock of everyone that would behold this spectacle.

"Awww… I wish I could see this" The sugestor said slumping a little disappointed.

Everyone just starred disgusted as he continued making out with the animal. Before the boy's girlfriend told him "No!... just be glad you can't see it"

The kissing pair broke apart and face towards the audience before the man shouted "ONE!!!" then turned back on the animal.

Hearing that everyone just broke apart and headed in their respective directions cringing as even though they had made it blocks away the still heard the numbers being counted.

After making it home the girl said "Ok, seriously why did you have to do that? That was the creepiest thing I have ever seen."

"I wouldn't say that… I mean today Anko… sort of… hit on me" he said a little confused himself. "she at least hit me… but I think that was just to grab my ass" he said still a bit weirded out by that whole situation.

"Gross" she said back. She mulled it over in her mind a few moments trying to out weight each one to think what was more disgusting before settling on the thought that she just wanted both images out of her head. "Lets just not think about that anymore" she said giving up.

"I agree" he said before they headed off to bed.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

The time of the month.

nOTES to you: here I am late again. Sorry guys. But on the bright side it is both a good chapter and a long one, Now I'm gonna keep trying to post once a week, so, Oh yeah And i had a good deal of help from my friends the azure and saffron war machines as well. Oh and here are some answers, First I read the reviews… like all of them, so here is the first part "Will this continue past the week?" yes I think I have room enough for a good lot of chapters after the week is up. "Will there be a lemon?" Though I am completely capable of writing that, I just don't think I'm gonna ruin this story by doing it. Oh, and a plot related issue This is a HUGE manga spoiler if you havne't read up to 385 then don't read the rest of thisnote, but you can read the chapter without issue. Now In 385 you probably know what happens if you're still reading, however I think They are seting up for a comeback from our favorite pervert, If you think about it , it would be really easy for him to just activate some kind of water breathing thing and pow done also toads can regenerate their limbs so I'm just assuming that he knew a technique for both problems.

THANKS for the support and have a good read.

Once a month the human female body goes through a "period" of sorts that causes the body to act in a strange way, not only can it cause mood swings, but it also changes the behavior of the body its self. This is commonly referred to as PMS. And unfortunately for Naruto this was today.

With modern medical ninjustsu the length of this period can be shortened to 12 to 14 hours. But for every actions there is a reactions, and while the duration is shortened, the affects are heightened to compensate for the changed duration. In other words the side can effects include increased mood swings, swelling of hands or feet, nausea, bloating, and increased sex drive.

"WAKE UP IT'S NINE O' CLOCK" was our hero's rude awakening as he had no inclination as to what was going on.

He drowsily sat up and tried to come to attention of what exactly was going on.

"huh, what's going on" he in confusion. "It's still early and we don't really have any plans for today"

"Just hurry up and eat your breakfast, I don't wanna stay here all day."

"not to be mean but what's with the attitude, did I do something wrong?" he said genuinely concerned.

"… sorry… it's just… nothing" she said trying to cover up.

He put a look on his face that pretty much stated "Yeah right, I'm not buying it" before he decided to use her own weapon against her. "Well, if I'm gonna be your boyfriend then I need to know what's wrong" he said, slightly mocking but emulating her words.

She let out a heavy sight then continued to actually explain what was going on. "Naruto… I'm having my period" she continued a little embarrassed.

"huh? I don't understand."

"It's 'that' time of the month"

"Still not following" he said as he cocked his head to one side.

"Do… you not know?" she asked.

"Know what?"

She hung her head. "Wow" she thought, "I guess you really don't learn some things without parents". She lifted her head and look at him before breaking the silence with "Eat your breakfast!" with that he was a little startled, yet decided it was wise to actually do so. With that she started to explain how things work.

Five minutes later, and Naruto could not keep a straight face any longer. He cracked up. "Yeah right!" he said not believing a word. "I could have believed everything else but, bleeding from HA ha ha ha no seriously, you thought I would buy that?!?!"

Her silence said it all. As he waited for her response his face slowly changed to a disturbed one as he realized every word was the truth. Ending his change with a look of complete shock he said "That's the sickest thing I've ever heard!"

"Well I'm glad you found it so funny!" she said with a little malice in her voice from his disbelief of her. But she was sort of cut off from her anger as another side effect made it's way to the fore front. Looking at his face she couldn't help but think how bad she had wanted him.

"I'm sorry if your mad, but that is just…" he said shaking as he made his way from the table to the dresser to grab his clothes before going to the bathroom to change into his normal attire. A few moments later he came back out completely dressed and continued "No, seriously why did I need to hear that, it was-"

But he was cut off by the pink haired girl forcing him into a short make out session.

"What the heck is going on?! First your mad because-" he said but was shush be her finger going to his lips.

"Just relax" she said trying to ease him, "Take off you coat"

"But I thought you wanted to leave." He said trying figure out what was happening.

"I changed my mind, you're right we should stay here a little longer."

"But I never said I wanted to stay here you just-"

"Shut up and kiss me!" she said pulling him by his jacket into another short make out session. This time a little more violent than the last.

He was really confused now, (though not entirely unhappy about what just happened) but he could definitely tell something was wrong. He grabbed her wrists and forced her to stop before saying. "Wait, something's not right"

"Don't look a gift horse in the mouth" she said trying to force him a little,

"What does a horse have to-" he started to say before she overpowered him with her strength and made a grab for his pants. She was done playing.

"WHAT THE!?!?" He said startled at the fact that she was acting this way. "GET OFF ME!" he yelled trying to push her off. "This isn't what you want your just 'EMS'ing was it?" he then managed to actually get her off of him rather forcefully but still managed to accomplish his goal.

She started to run back to his direction but he started to make a bolt for the door. He managed to open it but was grabbed by her and forced back into the room where she made it completely clear that he had no way of stopping her from getting what she wanted other than running. In his attempts to push her off he found that her super strength not only made her unstoppable but that getting free was his only chance. It was at this moment that a few things passed through his head. First was "Wait, what the hell, am i doing, Isn't this what I want." At thee end of this though she bit into his earlobe causing him to wince in pain and scream out "AWWW you bit me1" then he thought "GAW!!! Not like this!, And she would probably kill me when she got back to her senses, so right, got to get away" Giving up his coat to get from her grip he ran outside and jumped to the bottom of the building. Where he took off in a mad and aimless dash.

It was about a block away from the commotion where the Hokage sat eating breakfast . in a small outdoor restaurant, she sat there peacefully eating her meal, but expecting her apprentice to find her there an hour late for work as she was. This was until she caught a glimpse of her favorite blonde shinobi. He dashed around the corner sliding, After coming to a stop he took off in full sprint somehow managing his way down the street without hitting anyone. However it was what he screamed that threw the older woman off guard. "SHE'S TRYING TO RAPE ME!!!" he yelled at the top of his lungs.

His scream was quickly justified as his Sakura Screamed with the same amount of force "Naruto! Get back here and take off your pants!!!"

Tsunade coughed up the food she was eating and laughed a little at the same time, a little shocked and still finding this a little funny she got up and walked to where the Naruto was going to be and as he came in range she grabbed his arm and stopped him.

"SOMEONE HELP!!! SHE'S GOT ME!!!" he screamed.

However the sound of her "Hello" made him relax as he knew he found one of the few people that could save him.

Sakura approached and slowed down to a stop in front of her master.

"What's going on?" the older woman asked.

"Um… nothing we were just going is all" Sakura said.

At this the blonde boy leaned into the older woman's ear and tried to tell his side of the story "She's trying to rape me" he said.

With this Tsunade said "Then what was that comment about his pants."

This made the pink haired girls face turn bright red as she now just realized what had happened. "UM… You… I mean..,. He spilled some sauce on his pants… and… wouldn't… change them?" she said questioning at the end as if directly asking her mentor to buy it.

The older woman just looked at her apprentice. She saw through the jutsu and knew everything that was going on. She cocked one eyebrow above the other, and pursed her lips raising them to one corner of her mouth. In an expression that said "I don't even know how I am supposed to believe that load of crap"

"Sakura you have the day off. Naruto you're spending the day in the Hokage's office." She said as if it were fact.

He leaned in again whispering "Thank you!" into her ear.

With that the three of them started on their way to the office. Sakura found herself following them not exactly knowing what she was doing following them, but decided that she didn't have anything planned for the day anyway.

After reaching the office the two teens sat in chair across from each other in front of the main desk against the side walls.

"It's gonna be hard to drink with both of them in here" Tsunade thought to herself.

The day proceeded fairly normally nothing was out of the ordinary except for one thing. No one could quite put their finger on it tell it burst through the door. Wearing the same clothes she had on yesterday.

Naruto couldn't see the person but was in fairly close proximity, and caught a whiff, it was a familiar scent but couldn't quite place it.

"Shizune are you late." The Hokage asked as this was probably the first time this had every happened.

He figured out what the scent was just in time to be confused by the voice. "But if you're… then what smells like Kakashi?" he asked making everyone's eyes nearly bulge out of their sockets and one of the faces turn red.

It stayed like this for a few uncomfortable moments before Shizune tried to change the topic. "So, why are they in here?"

This successfully exchanged one woman's blush for the others. Sakura sat there with pleading eyes looking at her master.

"Sakura tried to rape Naruto" she said giving her younger apprentice a look like this is what you

get for doing that.

\Sakura hung her head in shame and covered her face with her hands. Which was a just in time to stop Shizune's snicker when she realized it was the truth. "Really?" was all she said to follow this up.

It was silent for a few moments before they had decided it was best just to get to work and try to ignore everything that came to attention this morning. The day pressed on with the usual business assigning mission here processing papers there. That is until lunch time when The older of the two apprentices had left the room to get everybody lunch. The moment she was out of ears distance the gossip started.

"Oh, my gosh, did she and Kakashi" Sakura started.

"SHE SO DID!" the older woman interjected.

It was at this that the only boy in the room started to get frustrated. "Why do I have to listen to this?"

"You could tear their heads off. That'd shut 'em up" the fox said.

"Some how I doubt I could do that like this." He replied internally.

"Welll… So do you really think they did it?" the monster said.

"OH they total… Wait! I'm not getting into this conversation!" he said but unfortunately he managed to say this on outside.

This just caused both women to stare at him. "Um… ok?" the older said before continuing. At this exact moment a rather familiar visitor made his way through the window.

"Hey!" Jiraya said as made his way inside from the cold. He only appeared to have noticed the hokage as she waved back at him with a single hand to greet him. He walked up to the desk saying "I have some information on-" before he was cut off.

"HI PERVY-SAGE" The boy yelled at his teacher.

"Huh?" he said as he turned around "OH! Hey kiddo how have you been?"

"A little blind lately" he said pointing to his eye patches.

"Oh that sucks, are you ok?" he said walking over to the boy.

"Yeah I'm fine" he said then pulled he teacher real close to whisper in his ear "It's ok because Sakura-chan is living with me tell I get better"

This gave his teacher his sort of "shit eating" perverted grin "So are you two…?" he said alluding to sex.

"No" he finished whispering "But we are a couple now" he said in his normal voice strength.

"REALLY?!?! Damit kid now I owe Tsunade fifty ryu."

"You bet against me?!?!"

"Well… come on… you're pretty hopeless and she always looses" he said folding his arms.

"Thanks for the support" he replied sarcastically/

"we should get lunch while I'm in town Naruto" he said turning back to the desk.

"Anyways, so as I was… hey wait… why are they in here anyway!?"/he asked.

Sakura shot a glance at Tsunade this time even more desparate she even went so far as to use sign language to say "PLEASE don't tell HIM!!! Anybody else but him!" but this just made the older woman smile.

"Sakura tried to rape Naruto" She said making the perverted old man turn to look at the young woman, who was now trying to hide her face in her hands again. It only took him a second to realize what was going on.

"Oh, I know that jutsu, last 12 to 14 hours, makes women crazy, In fact because of that I almost got raped once…" as he continued the older woman had regretted bringing it up with those words "… a month… for years" he continued building the woman's rage. "You see back when we were younger" he said but then he noticed it, that same feeling he would get those years ago, it made his eyes widen before he said "… I'm about to get raped aren't I?" with that the irate woman jumped over the desk and chased him out the door. It slamming behind them. A few loud steps and thud happened on the other side of the door and a muffled "AWWW you bit me!" came through before you could hear him break free and run down the hall.

This would have been funny to Naruto had he not realized that the moment they were left alone in the room Sakura stood up and made her way over to him. In response to this he said "Oh, crap" as he got up to try and run in a random direction away from her. But unfortunately with a deft movement of the hand the girl scratched behind his ear in the exact way as to make his leg shake. With it shaking out of his control he could not catch himself on the next step and fell to the floor where she immediately jumped on top of his back. Scraping with his nails on the floor in an attempt to escape he said "Sakura-chan please we're not ready for this yet"

But this only caused her to lean really close to him as say "I love it when you call me that"

It was at that moment that a certain black haired woman carrying the group's lunch entered the room saying "Lunch is here!!!…um" The two of them froze as She looked at the two on the floor and was a little shocked to see it "I'm not interrupting am I?"

"Help me" the boy said being molested by his girlfriend.

Though she was unable to assist him as the hokage followed her in slightly delayed, "Damn! He got away!" she said before seeing the reason her first apprentice had stopped. "Get! Off of him!" she said pulling her off and helping him to his feet. "Ok, that's it get out of the office! You're not allowed in here anymore today"

"aww, come on!... just give me five minutes with him" she asked getting a little serious at the end.

"OUT!!!" was the answer to her question and she sunk her head between her shoulders and walked to the door.

"Oh, here's your lunch" Shizune said holding the tray towards her depressed friend.

"Thanks" she said grabbing it as she walked away.

Once again the day continued on, and even though Naruto missed the ability to have a conversation with someone his own age all day, he still preferred that she wasn't near him. A few hours passed with usual business. Until another interesting person entered the room.

"what do I have to do today" shikamaru said rather boringly as he opened the door, that is until he saw his blinded friend sitting in a chair next to the door.

"Oh, hey shikamaru"

"hey… am I even going to want to know why you're here, or is this just going to be too troublesome?" he once again said in his same boring demeanor.

"well… I'm… trying…" he said knowing that she would probably kill him for repeating this when it wasn't necessary . "Not to get raped"

"Hmm, yeah… WAIT! WHAT?!?! 'YOU' can stay in here for that?!?!" he said trying to figure

out how this was fair.

"What do you mean?" Naruto said confused.

"I've asked you like five times if I can stay in here" he practically yelled at the woman behind the desk.

"You're not blind now here take your mission and get out"

"That's not fair", he said taking the scroll and heading out but being passed by Gai on his way in,

He entered and striking his thumbs up pose he confidently and almost a little to excitedly said "I'm here to pick up the pig!"

This got a snicker from all of the people in the room and a laugh as the pig tried to run, but he managed to catch it on it's way to try and pass him through the door. It's when this happened that he saw Naruto. "Oh, what are you doing here" he said.

Everyone was getting tired of that question and when the lean green pig dating machine though he had the answer no one wanted to try and say it again.

"Oh, yeah, I saw you running from Sakura earlier, what did you peek on her and she's trying to kill you or something." He said.

With a heavy sigh Naruto went to explain the situation. "Ok first off Blind! Second I would say she's trying to kill me because, she's kinda trying to rape me"

"Men can't get raped by women Naruto" he said back plainly as if it was a fact.

"Yes they can" he replied almost crying. "She has super strength!" he finished.

But before anything else could be said Tsunade cut them off saying "Gai come with me I need to talk with you about something, as they left the room Shizune grabbed a fat stack of papers.

"I'll be right back" she said "I've gotta go file these" she finished leaving the room.

This was the first time in most of a week Naruto that he was alone to himself, and he was sort of glad to be, One of the things that comes with raising yourself if that when your alone you feel like your at home. He leaned back in his chair and relaxed for a moment. His mind started to think, but he couldn't seem to get his mind off of Sakura, not that he was afraid that she would break in or anything but just that somehow the feeling of home now needed her to be complete. That is till he heard the window slide open and his thoughts immediately switched to fear of her breaking in.

"Hello Naruto" Sakura said as she walked towards him. He stood up and backed against a wall. "I'm gonna get you for that super strength comment" she said getting real close to him then grabbed him by the whiskers and forced their faces together. A few moments passed and the door to the office swung open as the hokage walked in.

"What the hell" she said walking towards the couple ferociously making out. "I leave the room for a minute and I come back and this is going on" With that she stuck her hands in between them and forced them apart with her strength.

"WAAAAA OWWWW!!!!" Naruto screamed as he turned around and bumped into the wall stumbling all over like he couldn't help it.

Sakura was a little shocked when she looked down to see six long whiskers in between her fingers, she looked up at her boyfriend and said "I'm so sorry… what the fuck is wrong with you?" seeing him stumble as if drunk unable to keep his balance.

"Have you ever seen what happens when you pull the whiskers off an animal? The stumble like crazy because they use them to help themselves balance." He said trying not to fall over until he bumped the wall again hard and fell to his knees where he just layed down "I'm just gonna lay here for a while" he said.

"Are you ok?" the girl holding his whiskers said.

"Yeah, they'll grow back in like an hour" he said still in great pain from them being ripped from his face.

"I'm so sorry" she said again this time kneeling over to give him a kiss on the cheek. To which he winced in pain.

"It's ok Sakura-chan I forgive you" he said still laying there.

"It's there anything I can do to help?" she asked not noticing that she was subconsciously rubbing his chest with her right arm.

"just go" he said.

" ok…" she said a little disappointed as she left the room.

It was starting to get late by then and though he now found himself able to stand without stumbling he still didn't regrow his whiskers yet. the day was ending and kakashi came in with a report when he asked the same question that was on everyone's mind that day. After a brief explanation of Naruto's situation Kakashi found himself baffled looking at Naruto's face and just how much he looked like his old teacher the fourth when he didn't have his whiskers.

"why are you staring at Naruto?" the hokage said.

"Oh, nothing he just looks exactly like his fath-" he said being cut off by the older woman's shush gesture. A few moment of silence went through the office.

"Huh? I look like what?" Naruto said confused.

"ummmm..." the older man said in return "hey, why don't you just stay with me tonight? I wake up at the drop of a pin so it would be no problem if she broke in." He finished trying to divert his attention which by his reaction seemed really easy.

"Ok! Yeah it'll just be me and Kakashi!" he said completely distracted from the two seconds ago.

"ok that works… but are you sure? She started chasing you around 9:00am so there is no way it'll last later than 11:00 tonight. And it's sort of Christmas Eve, she'll probably want the company tonight." the hokage interjected.

"Your right but… after today, when that wears off she'll probably want to be alone for a little bit." Naruto said.

"I suppose your right, well do whatever you want" she said

After a few minutes of giving the report and a short conversation, Naruto decided it was best to head out with his old teacher. On their way back to Kakshi's place a rather interesting conversation was sparked.

"So you and Shizune had a good time last night eh?"

"How did you find out about that!" he said surprised that that he knew.

"are you kidding she reaked of you" he said.

His eye scanned around the empty street affirming that no one else had heard "hey why don't we just keep this our little secret ok? If you do I'll buy you dinner how does that sound?"

"that sounds great!" he replied.

"good so… Ichi-"

"Ichiraku's!!!!!" Naruto yelled out.

After gorging on ramen they made it to the house and as they got ready to sleep Naruto was guided to a bed and sat down before he asked an interesting question.

"I just have to know one thing?"

"Hmm, what is it?" Kakashi asked

"Did you take your mask off during sex?"

"No, I did not" he replied.

"fair enough. Oh, so where are you sleeping just incase I need something" the blonde boy questioned

"Well I've only got the one bed." He said back.

"So… I mean… you're"

"Yes I'm sleeping in my bed" the white haired ninja replied.

"but…"

"listen you know i'm not gay, and you're not gay, so the only reason you would be stopping me here is if you actually were gay so-" he said but was cut off.

"NO, not gay, you're right, there's not a problem here, we're just sleeping, and that's all" he said defending his sexuality and thinking to him self "Damn when did Kakshi become so crafty"

"Good night kakashi" Naruto said.

"Night" was his response.

A few minutes passed and the blonde boy found himself still wide awake next to his snoring friend. This wasn't a big deal he just couldn't seem to sleep because for some reason something didn't feel right. It was then that he realized it "Sakura, I miss sleeping with Sakura" he said to himself quietly. He thought he had awaken his friend with that but he had only rolled to his side and continued his snoring, that is until Kakashi wrapped his arms around Naruto.

"Mmm Shizune, lets do that thing again… it felt so good" the grown man said tightening his grip.

"Kakashi" Naruto said trying to wake him. It had no effect. Instead he just started to try and feel him in places that were no appropriate.

"KAKASHI!" he now yelled. Once again this only made him progress more. "KAKASHI! KAKASHI! KAKASHI!!! KAKASHI!!!" he screamed until he finally broke free of his grasp by forcing himself up.

With that Kakashi roused and said "Hmm what's going on?"

"This isn't going to work. and Fuck a pin! You wake up at the blast of a stick of dynamite!"

"What do you mean?" he said rubbing his exposed eye.

"Well you don't usually call your guests Shizune?" the boy said to his old teacher.

"You mean… I didn't try to-"

"I'm afraid you did" Naruto said now standing across the room.

The embarrassed man looked over at the clock and said "It's only 10:45 we'll just take you home".

"I think that's for the best"

After a rather awkward long walk to his apartment they were standing outside before entering.

"Um… I think we should just try to forget-" Kakashi said trying to get past it.

"I'm certainly not going to tell anybody about this"

"Good good" he said knocking on the door, the moment he knocked something amazing happened.

The door opened with an amazing speed, a hand shot from the door pulling Naruto inside and almost faster than humanly possible Sakura said " Thanks for dropping him off Kakashi" and the door slammed shut.

A loud poof made it's way through the apartment and Kakashi was standing behind the two of them. "No no no," he said calmly and pushed them apart. "That's not gonna happen, but I kinda have to go"

"What time is it?" Naruto asked.

"10:55" Kakashi said back.

"Wait five more minutes" Naruto pleaded and got his wish.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Chapter 7

The most wonderful time of the year

Notes to you: merry Christmas… (over two months ago) well at least I'm good at being late. Anyway this part of the story is late as usual, the saffron and azure war machine has lent me htheir aid, and their houses on this chapter, Real sorry by the way for the extreme lateness, however in return for that you get this gigantic chapter, So no complaining, As for release dates, hopefully I can make good on one every two weeks, anyway on with the show I guess.

"CHRISTMAS!!" was screeched throughout Naruto's house as this was his rude awakening, with this he shot to a sitting position and out of instinct punched blindly, landing his fist straight into his wall, and making a rather sizeable hole.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!" he screamed back.

"It's Christmas!" she yelled while jumping into his lap and giving him a huge hug.

Startled by this he ripped his hand from the wall, and tried to push his would be assailant, off of him.

"What are you doing I'm trying to give you a hug Naruto-kun?" Sakura said.

"Huh? Oh Sakura, what are you screaming about?!"

"It's Christmas the best day of the… um" at this moment she realized that in his attempts to push her off all the more he managed to do was place his hands directly on her chest "… Naruto… you're sort of grabbing my breasts"

"Huh?" this was when he realized that he was doing exactly that, and as though it was his only reaction he flinched almost immediately covering his face expecting the beating of his life. Before he screamed "NO, I'm Sorry it was an accident!"

But he was cut off by her finger going to his lips "It's ok, I kinda owe you for yesterday" she said a little embarrassed. "you could have had everything yesterday, so I guess I at least owe you that… just don't let it happen again" she finished rather evilly.

"Yeah ok" he said scratching the back of his head in his normal pose a little frightened " so… what were you talking about?"

She started her rather long explanation of the holiday, talking about Christmas cards and cheer and what not but Naruto couldn't seem to pull his thoughts away from the fact that he had just groped his girlfriend. "Awesome!" he thought "Those were GREAT! What am I retarded? WHY DID I TURN THAT DOWN YESTERDAY?!" but his thoughts were broken.

"Um… are you listening?" his girlfriend asked.

"Boobs? WHAT?! I meant what!" he said trying to cover up.

"Ok, you're about this close to getting beaten anyway" she said a little angry.

"I… sorry" he said.

"It's alright just get up and get dressed we need to go." Sakura said while jumping off of him.

"Go, what are you talking about what time is it?" the boy said sitting up to the edge of the bed.

"five…" she said sketchily.

"What are you sick in the head? Why are we waking up so early?" Naruto said laying back down after hearing this.

"Well we've got a lot to do today it's Christmas"

"It may be Christmas for you, but it's just Wednesday to me" Naruto conveyed apathetically.

"First of all it's Thursday and second of all, we're both going to have to compromise here, it may be 'Wednesday' to you, but it is Christmas, that makes it Christmas Thursday, and that means we do everything that I planned, and if there's time we can do something you want."

He let out a heavy sigh., before saying. "That's not a compromise"

"look. If you're going to be with me there are three days a year you're just going to have to live with me being right."

"your birthday, valentines day, and Christmas…" he said a little disappointed as he knew she was very right on this one point.

"Yeah I… wow you actually got that right"

"Lucky guess" he said.

"Well anyway get in the shower and get dressed, In your good clothes"

"Aww come on" he said depressed.

"No arguments, I want you looking best at my moms and your ratty old clothes aren't gonna cut it"

"Hey, their not ratty…" there was a small silence "fine but I'm at least going to wear the coat it's cold outside"

They got dressed and Sakura made breakfast for the two which was a rather hearty one at that, between the waffles and practically candy he felt it to be a little over the top. Hesitantly  
Naruto made his way out of the door a little after Sakura as he stopped to put on his coat and made his way down the stairs. After coming off the last step into the street he stopped to look for his guide before calling out to her, but there was no response he took a few steeps forwards to hear "Heads up!" be called out be Sakura behind him. He whipped around only to be pelted with a snowball right in the chest.

"OW WHAT THE!?" he said getting into a defensive stance.

"Ha, it's a snowball fight" she said sort of snickering at his reaction.

"OH YEAH" he said as he grabbed a ball and threw it not terribly accurately. It whipped three stories up and smashed into a window causing it to break. To which he cringed at the sound.

"That wasn't…"

"Yeah… that was your window… you're not very good at this are you-" she continued talking.

With this the boy homed into the sound and prepared another ball sending it flying straight into her mouth.

"cough What... Spits oh now it's on" she said.

They slowly circled around each other finding that both fighters were in fact a worthy foe. Sakura jumped down grabbing a ball and throwing it at an incredible speed towards her boyfriend; he deftly jumped out of the way and the ball went flying hundreds of yards into the distance.

Somewhere… hundreds of yards in the distance, Gai power dating to try and end his punishment early was making out with a pig for the last necessary time. When suddenly through the air comes an icy rock pelting him smack in the face. "WOW! This pig really knows how to kiss!!"

Back with our hero we find his counter attack to be rather lackluster as he missed but just barely this time, that is until he stood still confirming what he heard with his hearing. "Oh now that's just not-" he said before being crushed with the base of a rather large snowman. All that could be seen was his twitching foot protruding from the snow. "MMMM" was all that could be heard from beneath the snow.

She walked causally over to her victim and grabbed a hold of his foot and pulled him out forcefully and dragging him so that when he exited the ball his face fell two feet onto the snow.

"Oww" was muffled but came from the snow. He sat up and stated "You win"

"Damn straight I win" she helped him to his feet and continued on "Ok, now on with the first thing of the day."

"What's that" he said still exasperated from being crushed.

"Telling everybody Merry Christmas but Narut-…"

"What was that?" he said a little mad and shocked.

"Nothing, I said telling everybody merry Christmas"

"That wasn't it"

"Look back when you were young… I mean, you used to be… You were annoying and"

"You bitch" he said lowly and rather angrily.

This caused her to scowl quite heavily and glare daggers at him, "You don't call me that!"

"but you"

"TAKE! It back" she said incredibly pissed off.

Sensing his eminent doom if he did not do as he was told he talked "Oh… sorry, I don't mean it"

With that she lightened up but still stood rather firm against his will even though she knew that she had acted as a total bitch.

"but you can't expect this to be ok, I mean really, you would specifically avoid me"

sigh "you're right… Merry Christmas Naruto there you got the first one of the year"

"That's not enough, I mean out of all the years-" but he was cut off by being pulled into a long and affectionate kiss. A little stunned at the quality of this particular kiss he felt his aggression melt before he continued after their break. "well, that's…"

"Nobody's ever gotten that for Christmas from me before" she said as she wiped a little bit of spit from the corner of her mouth.

"That totally made up for it."

"Good now lets go"

They walked around the village telling everybody Merry Christmas… everybody! It was astounding how many people they had to tell it to, she just kept pulling him from one street to the next wishing everyone they passed, to which he joined in as well. That is until the passed some people that Naruto actually started recognizing some people.

"Oh Merry Christmas Shikamaru!" she yelled out to him as he came near.

"Oh hey, see you guys are still stuck together" the lazy ninja said.

"Yeah we can't really leave until I'm not blind again" Naruto said.

"yeah… wait Sakura I though you said that he wasn't-" she realized what the lazy ninja was about to say and flailed her arms to try and shut him up before he continued ignoring her "worthy of telling Merry Christmas to"

This made Naruto scowl a little angrily.

"great now we have to deal with this again" Sakura said.

"Shikamaru!!" was heard being called out from behind them

"Oh no!" he said frantically. Looking around he found himself an open barrel next to them and jumped head first straight into it. This successfully hid him completely.

Just then a rather happy looking Temari came up to the two standing there.

"Hey you two, how are you" Temari said.

"Good, oh and merry Christmas" Sakura said cheerfully.

"merry Christmas to you too" she said back. "how about… what happened to your eyes"

"Oh this it's nothing I'm supposed to get these off real soon" Naruto said.

"ok well, hey you guys havn't seen Shikamaru have you?" the sand ninja asked.

"Why no, we haven't seen him at all" the pink haired girl said while pointing to the barrel. That he was hiding in.

With this she looked around and found the lid to the barrel and quickly slapped it on and locked it in place. Before she knocked over the barrel and started to roll it off. At that you could hear the barrels resident screaming.

"NOOOOO!! DAMN YOU SAKURA!! DAMN YOU NARUTO!!"

"That was really mean" Naruto said.

"He deserved it" Sakura answered.

"No I mean saying I'm not worthy of…" he said.

"Come on I already gave you a kiss"

"Yeah… but that doesn't mean I wouldn't like another one." He said baiting her.

"um, no" she said dragging him along.

"wait what do you mean 'no' that isn't fair. You can have one whenever you want, just by asking me, but I somehow have to earn them?" he said.

"That's right" she said stopping and turning to give him a kiss.

"Well then what was that?" he asked happily.

"I wanted that one" she said keeping them on track.

"Uhuh right sure, whatever you have to tell yourself" he joked with a smile.

After a few more, moments of walking and talking to people they found their way to the second stop for the day.

"Here we are" She said as she stepped inside the cafe.

"Where is this place?"

"It's on main street near the front gates it's a little café that is… well their just ok." Sakura said.

" Oh yeah I think I saw this place before, it just next to the bakers shop, but if it's just ok, then why are we where?"

"because they have the best hot chocolate in the city come Christmas time."

"well if you say so"

She walked him over to a table "wait here I'll order and come back" She did just that after a couple of moments of waiting in line.

"So anyway Naruto are you ok with everything we did today, I mean your not angry that you have to go do all this stuff with me are you?"

"what? No Sakura I'm fine, it's actually kind of fun being with you, except for the fact that my feet still hurt." Naruto said.

"That's good, I was afraid I was making you do something you didn't want to,"

"Well thanks for considering me." Naruto said slowly letting his mind drift out of the conversation but still acting as if he was there mentally. Once again he found himself thinking about what had happened earlier this morning. Sakura on the other hand had stayed fully involved in the conversation and proceeded to talk to him. It wasn't till Sakura asked a question that Naruto was brought back from his thoughts.

"So what do you think Naruto?"

Inside Naruto's head:

"OH SHIT WHAT THE FUCK DID SHE SAY? Something about a… or was it something less? "Crap, wait FLUFFY, did you hear what she said?"

"Boobs, WHAT?! I meant… boobs" the fox said.

"Crap you weren't listening either?!"

"No'

"Shit we're screwed and, HEY YOU DON"T GET TO THINK ABOUT THAT"

"Oh, like you wouldn't in my shoes?" the fox said back.

"…No I would-"

"liar"

He knew that he had been beat but it was Sakura that broke the silence both mentally and physically "Um, Naruto? Are you listening?"

Back in Naruto's head:

"Shit what should I do?" Naruto said.

"I don't know… change the subject, tell her something like her hair looks good today"

IN THE REAL WORLD;

"Your hair looks great today Sakura-chan"

"Thanks Naruto I really tried to make it look good for… wait what is that supposed to mean you can't see?"

Inside Naruto's head:

"You screwed us"

"Me I said something 'like' that" said the fox.

IN THE REAL WORLD;

"Whatever but I still want an answer?" she said.

Inside Naruto's head:

"Shit, I guess I'll just wing it" Naruto said.

IN THE REAL WORLD;

"Oh you know, typical guy response" Naruto said in a rather flawless manner.

"yeah I know what you mean"

Inside Naruto's head:

"Holy shit it worked kit!! I gotta give you that one"

IN THE REAL WORLD:

"But will you do it?"

He couldn't stall anymore and there was no way he could go back now, not without seeming like a total ass, So Naruto pressed on. "Um, yeah sure Sakura"

"Thanks Naruto-kun I really owe you" she said before giving him a small yet affectionate thank-you kiss.

Inside Naruto's head:

"Guess I'll have to cross that bridge when I get there" Naruto said to himself before deciding it would be wise to make sure that he paid attention to the rest of the conversation. After a few more moments their order came up and was in fact quite delicious, but at the same time not something you would go out of your way for, at least that is how the blind boy felt. But not long after finishing they began to leave the cafe.

"Ok so what's next" Naruto asked.

"Well I was thinking we should try and help the homeless down at the shelter like I do every Christmas"

"Well I don't really…" he started before going silent knowing that no matter what he said he would only get out of this by pissing her off and that wasn't something he enjoyed. "Ok lets go" he said finishing.

"Thanks for understanding Naruto-kun"

He knew that he wasn't really happy with everything he was doing, but he knew that it would definitely score him some favor point with her in the future, which he couldn't help feeling was more valuable than the amount of effort he was having to put in.

They arrived at the shelter to find it fairly packed as usually for the time of year, which was good because they were always looking for a helping hand. Sakura guided them inside where they met up with the head of the shelter to see what they could do to help, but were a little surprised at his reaction.

"Y-Y-Y-… YOU… YOU GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME KID!!" the shelter manager yelled and pointed a finger after setting his sights on Naruto.

"What is that about?" Sakura said back getting the mans attention.

After seeing her he seemed to calm down quite a bit but still seemed to be a bit wary of the blonde. "He's with you Sakura?!" he said a little surprised but actually questioning at the same time.

"Yeah…" was all she said back.

"I'm not sure what's going on here…" Naruto interjected.

"well it's just…" the man said while subconsciously covering his left foot with his other "I guess it's nothing" he said giving up most of his worry.

"Oh I get it, you think I'm some kind of monster because of the whole nine tailed fox thing, because I'm not-"

"No, no, it's not that… I hope… anyway just forget it ok" the man finished realizing his position "We can always use the help around here so you two are welcome, Sakura it's nice to see you again as always and um, what your nam… are you blind?!" he said cutting himself off when he realized it.

"Oh, yeah but it's only temporary I'll get these bandages off in a couple days, oh and the names Naruto" the boy said giving his thumbs up pose.

"right nice to meet you… Sakura you can take whatever position needs help in the kitchen, I'll try and find something he can do"

With that they all left the room and headed towards the kitchen. After looking around for a moment or two the manager decided that serving soup wouldn't be to hard for someone blind so set him up with a rather large ladle and had him stand there waiting for people to ask for soup. "Ok, yeah I think this can work, if you see someone that got back in the line a second time though just remember we don't have that much food for all these people so no seconds" the manager said trying just give him some basic instruction.

"That might be a little hard" Naruto said back.

"Oh, crap, I mean sorry" the manager stumbled over his words.

"It's fine"

It was at that moment that a rather scraggily looking man approached the two and asked for a serving of the soup, when Naruto happily obliged by taking a ladle and plunging it deep in the steaming pot and pulling it out, putting it out to pour but not waiting for the man to put the bowl out first and pouring a heaping spoon full of the scalding liquid right onto the mans shoulder while saying "There you go!" Which had he not been blind would have most definitely looked and sounded evil. The homeless man immediately screamed in pain causing everyone to look at Naruto smiling as he burned someone. Before saying "Huh whats going on, why did everything get quiet?" with that every realized what had happened and went on with there business.

"OH SORRY!" the manager said leaning over the counter staring at the man who got back to his feet.

"It's ok, it wasn't that hot, it just startled me most of all. But let me ask what idiot puts a blind guy in charge of serving soup, whoever that is whoever that is should get a piece of my mind" the rather smelly old man said.

"That's a good question! I'll find out and fix this!" the manager said trying to cover his tracks.

"Um…" Naruto said raising a hand slightly not knowing what to say but was then caught by that hand by the manager and dragged off to the back, while he asked again "Wait why did everything get quiet?"

"You mean you don't know what happened"

"No" Naruto said plainly as if fact but still sort of asking a question..

"So why did you think the guy screamed?!"

"I though he was screaming from the joy of soup!" he said seriously thinking this was the truth.

"WHO screams in joy?!" the continued manager yelling.

"um… I do…" he replied trying not to seem like an idiot.

"really?"

"Oh yeah I scream all the time for stuff…" he said unconvincingly But wouldn't quit talking for some reason. "you know like AHHHHH!! A new mission? Or like Ahhh… I'll just shut up"

"right… you're a nightmare kid" The manager said actually shuddering at still having to deal with him.

After a long pause Naruto was assigned his new job, it was a simple job just cutting onions and other vegetable for various things, though the manager seem especially hesitant to hand a knife to him, but eventually gave this thought up. With that he finished with saying "just put whatever you cut into this bucket. And that's it if you run out just let us know" and after that he walked away. Now alone to his work Naruto found himself bored. With each passing vegetable he found himself getting more and more weary of the work and decided that should he get all of it done he could go on to greater things, or at least less boring then that. So he chopped faster, and faster and faster, until he found himself kind of liking this. Not because it was fun but because it was something he found that he could easily show off at. He got into the habit of throwing the vegetable in the air and chopping it entirely before it would hit the board. Which was quite fun, so he though that it would be even funner to keep going. Two then three, he was good, but about when he got to four at a time the knife was now soaking wet from the juices from the vegetable and in the middle of chopping the third one in the air the knife slipped out of his hand.

It ricocheted once off a pot to Narutos upper right, before making a rather dull thud in the floor followed by a crashing sound and another scream with the screamer saying "THAT'S IT I'M NEVER COMING BACK TO THIS SHELTER AGAIN!!" . Naruto cringed his shoulders at the sound and turned to face the calamity before hearing "NO!! HE'S AT IT AGAIN!!"

Sakura at this point found herself unable to ignore the situation any longer, she walked over to help the manager to his feet when she noticed the knife had nailed his foot to the floor, through his right big toe, "Oh my gosh are you OK!?"

"Yeah I'm fine!" he said rather loudly and shakily but found himself able to calm down when he realize that his attack was only standing there with a worried look on his face, and was not in fact pouncing on him, even though he was still very pissed off he continued. "Somebody already CUT THAT TOE OFF!!" he yelled staring straight at Naruto. "That's it kid you're out of here, GET OUT!"

"YES!!" Naruto thought to himself.

But Sakura couldn't let that happen in her mind and pleaded with the manager "OH come on, please, it was an accident, please just give him another chance?"

"WHAT?! NO, SHUT UP Sakura, PLEASE!!" He continued thinking.

The man pried the knife from his shoe and looked back and fourth at the two before taking a long look at Sakura, "All right,… ONE more chance, ONE, and if he screws that up he's out of here."

"THANK YOU, you won't regret it" she said.

"Crap" Naruto said aloud. Before immediately trying to cover up with "I mean 'crap I'm sorry' I didn't mean to stab you in the toe, oh damn it"

The manager rose to his feet with Sakura's help and walked over to him and took a long hard squint into his bandages, "Whatever… just come with me"

"ok sir" Naruto replied and attempted to do as he was told but was caught by Sakura.

"Naruto – try not to screw this up for me, it won't be much longer till we can go"

"I'll try" he said before following him into a back room.

"OK, kid this is simple, all you have to do is turn off the oven when the timer dings"

"Ok sounds simple enough"

"don't forget or you'll ruin all of that food, it's gonna be like 15 minutes. Here" he said dragging  
Narutos hand to the knob on the oven "This knob, turn it off when it dings, we can take care of the rest."

"Ok got it" Naruto said.

"Alright," the manager said before getting a real unhappy look on his face "oh, and you know the only reason you're still here is because Sakura wants you to be"

"um, that's the only reason I came in the first place" Naruto said scratching the back of his head which actually earned a small chuckle from both of them.

"fair enough" he said as he exited the room. Before yelling "15 MINUTES!!"

With that our hero was alone and not only was he alone in a back room, he was bored alone and in a back room. But at least the chair he found was fairly comfy and he decided to make the best of it. He leaned back and tried to get some shut eye while wait for the timer. Which worked fine, sure enough the time passed and the timer dinged, rousing our now slightly groggy hero from his slumber and making him reach up and grab the knob turning it all the way into the full on position instead of off, not that he knew of course and he decided to try and get some more sleep.

About 8 minutes into the future Naruto was awoke by a very loud "What the hell?!"

It was at that time the obscene amount of smoke pouring from the oven crept it's way into Naruto's nostrils, and made him realize that he had fucked up one more time, which he was quite sure was the exact number of times the manager would let him fuck up again.

"KID YOU FUCKING BURNED THE-OH SHIT FIRE!!"

"Well…shit!" was all Naruto said before slumping forward and getting up to walk out from harms way that is before he was smashed into a wall directly after standing up because a rather irate man with a fire extinguisher forced him out of the way while running to fix the situation.

After a few moments of rubbing his face he could here the man quit spraying the extinguisher and turn to face him.

"Was that one"

"YOU BETTER FUCKING BELIEVE THAT WAS ONE!!"

"Alright, but…"

"No buts"

"you never told me which way to turn the knob" Naruto continued holding one finger erect.

"I!!..." The manager said before realizing that he was entirely right. He gave a real pissed off at himself sort of look before rolling his eyes. "I guess your right, BUT you're still not helping anymore."

"That's fine with me"

"Just wait outback, Sakura should be out in a little while" The manager said rubbing his eyes.

"Is everything ok?!" they heard yelled from the other room.

"yeah!" the man said before saying to Naruto "Seriously get out here's the door"

"…sighOk" Naruto said before walking out side and hearing the door slam behind him. It was only a moment later that he found himself a bench next to the building and wiped the snow off of the seat and sat down in the gusty alley. It was cold, freezing even, but going back inside was definitely worse than that.

Sakura after about thirty minutes found herself content with the amount of work she had done, and was ready to go when she asked the manger where Naruto was to which he replied "sigh alright he's back here follow me"

Sakura walked out the door to catch the sound of a shadow clone disappearing and rather large puff of smoke.

"Naruto?" Sakura questioned.

"Right here" he said back looking at her with a smile as she turned to see him.  
"What…" she said thinking about she saw"…oh never mind, I'm ready to go"

"OH," Naruto said as he sat there.

The manager followed them out and after ignoring what he thought he heard to he started to speak "Sakura it was a pleasure to have you help us again"

"oh thanks, just doing my part" she said happily.

"And you?..." the manager said "don't come back…"

"What…" Naruto started.

"Not even if you're homeless" he said cutting Naruto off closing the door behind him.

"What was that about?" Sakura asked knowing the answer.

"…I" Naruto started but was cut off by the sound of one of his own clones walking around the corner, zipping up his fly and sitting down next to Naruto

"Wow it's cold" the clone said as he wrapped his arms around Naruto "It's a good thing we can use multiple clones to keep warm…huh? Where is every one" it said before disappearing.

Naruto slapped his hand to his forehead, before Sakura broke into laughter.

"OH my GOSH!! Ha! You were hugging yourself Hahahaha!!"

"Oh Damit" Naruto said.

"I thought guys don't get cold as easily as girls" Sakura said still laughing.

"It's not that funny, everyone gets cold" Naruto said angrily defending himself.

"Yes it is" Sakura said before breaking her laughter "Oh I've gotta tell everyone"

"What?! NO!!"

"Should have though about before that clone came back" she said running off to the exit of the alley.

"I forgot about that one!! Come on?!" he said trying to make his way after her.

She stopped at the exit of the alley remembering that he couldn't follow her without aid and waited for him to catch up. Before chuckling one more time at the thought.

"It's not that funny" Naruto said finally catching up.

"Oh, come on I was only kidding" Sakura said taking his arm to guide him.

"I'm glad you see things my way" he said.

"yeah,… but I'm still telling" she snickered only getting a loud sigh from Naruto and putting a rather pouty look on his face.

"Oh, don't give me that look," She said trying to comfort him " I know what'll cheer you up, lets get some ramen, what do you say"

"Ramen's delicious but, it can't heal pride" he said still moping. \

"Fine, we won't-" Sakura said before being cut of rather violently.

"NO!!..." he yelled before coming back down. "maybe it can help some"

"That's what I thought" Sakura said smiling knowing that it would indeed heal his wounds.

After a few moments of walking Sakura broke the silence, something had been on her mind all day, and even though she was not particularly good at hiding it, Naruto's blind state kept him from noticing a thing. "Naruto… We should talk"

Naruto knew only a few things from his short life, but one of them was that if you ever hear those words it's usually a bad thing. "I'm sorry Sakura, I didn't mean to do it"

"What? You didn't do anything what are you talking about?" Sakura said.

"Oh, um nothing"

"Wait... did you do something?" she asked now curious.

"No, I'm mean, I…" He said trying to defend himself from actually nothing as he only said his first sentence as a reaction. "I…I'm sorry about messing the thing at the homeless shelter up so bad" He said realizing if he gave a reason it would save him from her questioning all day as to what he had done.

"sigh apology accepted but No, that wasn't it all,"

"Phew" Naruto thought to himself.

"What I wanted to talk to you about was yesterday"

"Oh"

"Yeah, 'Oh'… look I… Umm…" she said trying to figure out exactly what to say still guiding him down the road " Ok, look, yesterday, when I was… well you did something that almost no guys would ever do, You refused my 'advances' because you knew that I wasn't in my right mind, so…" she continued coking one eyebrow up "basically, you didn't take advantage of me, when I was trying to take advantage… of… you?"

"Yeah…" he said back a little confused.

She let out a sort of shrugging sound before saying "lets just say you made the right choice" and giving him a small peck on the cheek. "Thank you"

"Your welcome Sakura to tell you the-" Naruto said before being cut off.

"Just don't talk about it anymore, it's seriously the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to me."

Naruto thought about his current situation and smirked an evil smirk before saying " Oh, yeah Sakura, I won't talk about anymore with you… I'm just gonna tell everybody about it, you now like my hugging thing"

"Naruto you kinda screamed it to the whole village if you remember" Sakura said

"Oh… right" Naruto replied.

"It's ok, lets just go eat" Sakura finished guiding him down the street.

After a good serving of twelve bowls of ramen Naruto found himself on the way back to his house with an order to go of one last bowl, on his way to pick up the presents he was wise enough to not carry with him all day. A very short time after leaving the restaurant Naruto broke into the ramen and began to eat it when Sakura began to lecture him a little.

"I don't know why your eating that right now we're gonna be at your house in like two mi… Oh my gosh" She was cut off by the spectacle of Naruto placing the now entirely empty bowl over his head.

"I AM THE KING OF RAMEN!! THIRTY SECONDS FLAT!!" Naruto loudly proclaimed.

"Why are you so retarded? And plus you've got bits of your soup all over your head." She said while make a face that clearly showed that she had no clue as to why she was with him.

With this Naruto started to clean the little piece off his face before recognizing two of the pieces as the little swirly bits, and deftly placed them over his bandages and turned his face to Sakura. "Sakura look". When she did she instantly remembered why she liked him, because the look of him spinning his head in circles while wobbling back and fourth, with the bowl still on his head and swirly eyes, was exactly what she found to be funny.

After a short snicker she said "That was pretty good, but seriously how can you eat so much?"

"Well I've got two mouths to feed Sakura" he said back quickly.

This caused her to laugh before saying "It's not like your pregnant."

"You don't know that! I might have him one day, and he'll be so cute and seven hundred feet tall and wait! Wouldn't that have to come out of my penis? Ohhh that would hurt so bad" he said while grabbing his groin subconsciously.

With that the face came back" Uhhg! Seriously, Why am I with you?" Sakura said.

"Because you like me, and I'm sexy" Naruto sort of sang to her jokingly.

Inner Sakura couldn't help but say "well, he does have a point" but real Sakura actually jokingly said back " No, I hate you"

"That's not true, You hit me all the time, and Tsunade said that that means… you… love…? me…? Wait that doesn't make any sense, do you really hate me?" Naruto asked a little worry in his voice.

"Tsunade said that?" Sakura said.

"Don't change the subject, Do you hate me?!" Naruto still questioning.

She turned to face him with a short peck on the lips. " It's ok Naruto-kun, I don't hate you that much."

"Well, what would you do to someone you like?" He questioned baiting her.

"This" was all she said before dragging him into a much longer kiss, during which she slowly removed the bowl, and tossed it into the garbage.

At that he ripped from her lip lock screaming "MY CROWN!!"

"It's garbage" She said.

"How dare you call a kings crown garbage! Give it back" he demanded.

"It's already in the trash" she continued.

"But" Naruto interjected one last time.

"No… oh and don't say that penis thing to my mom" she said while dragging him on their way.

"Aww." He finished.

They grabbed the gifts from his apartment and making sure the window had some cardboard over it to keep the place from freezing over. Which was fine because the window was three stories up on the side of the building, so security wasn't an issue. (I mean it would take some kind of ninja to break into that…yeah) And then they were off.

On the way to the mom's house though, Sakura thought it was a good idea, to warn Naruto of a few things.

"Oh, Naruto, you should probably know" she said thinking, of what to warn him of. "First off, my mom is a… TERRIBLE COOK, horrendous even."

"Well why don't you just tell her then" he said.

"That's a terrible idea, she would just get angry, please just grit your teeth and eat it." she pleaded.

"But I'm not gonna lie to your mom" He countered.

"Yeah but I don't want you to hurt her feelings, just don't say anything" Sakura said.

"No promises" Naruto said back.

"oh, and one more thing, eggnog, she makes the worst eggnog the planet has ever seen. And whats worse is SHE'S PROUD OF IT!!, it's bad trust me, and there is no way out of her asking you how you like it so please, PLEASE just get it down and smile" she asked.

"It can't really be that bad" Naruto said but then thought about it "can it?"

Her silence answered the question. "listen just don't screw this up"

"I'll try" he said hoping that he could actually pull this off. "hey, didn't we just eat?"

"That's why we ate" she said as they rounded the corner to the house.

They knocked on the door and waited for her mother to open the door.

"HEY, you guys are here Naruto glad you make it, you two come on it I've got dinner all ready" Sakura's mom said causing Sakura to clench Naruto's hand violently at the sound of "dinner all ready"

"Oh, yeah great, can't wait to dig in" Sakura said.

They walked inside and removed their coats before moving into the kitchen, continuing with their greetings. The sat down and the putrid smell of the indeed awful meal found its way into Naruto face, which nearly made him gag.

"Wow that sure smells… Uh, yeah… Um…" Naruto said.

"Great huh?" Sakura said.

"Um, yeah" Naruto said as he shook his head a little.

"Dig in!" Sakura's mom said as they all sat in front of their plates.

Naruto grabbed his utensils and plunged them into something before bringing it to his mouth. The room grew silent as both mother and daughter were fixated on his reaction to the food. A moments more hesitation and Naruto placed the piece of food into his mouth. It felt like an eyeball, and tasted, well much worse that what you might think an eyeball tasted like. It was somehow gritty yet slimy. Naruto swallowed the bite and thought he might not be able to keep it down, but it slowly did.

"Well" both girls said in unison.

"This is really…" Naruto said but couldn't think of anything other than awful things to say "This is really… SHIT! THIS is TERRIBLE!! This is probably the worst thing I've ever eaten. I'm sorry Sakura but I can't lie THIS IS DISGUSTING!! How can you even do that to food? I'm sorry but that was bad."

There was nothing but stunned silence across the whole room, Sakura with a shocked expression stared at him with almost disbelief.

"… Thank you" Sakura's mom said, which made Sakura turn her head and drop her jaw at her mother response. "I've been making this terrible meal for years, Sakura just keeps asking for it for Christmas, but it's awful," She continued.

"… CAH! MOM!! I Hate this meal" Sakura said.

"Why didn't you tell me?!" Sakura's mom asked.

"I always thought you'd be mad" Sakura said.

"Well thank you again Naruto, I am so tired of making this crappy meal, it takes hour to make and is just terrible, if you had lied not only would we have had to have eaten this! We would have had to suffered through it again and again. So, Come on, get your coats, we're going out." Sakura's mom said as she got up and walked into the other room and yelled "So where are we going?"

Naruto raised his hand with excitement on his face and started to say "ICH-"

"NO" Sakura said slapping his hand down.

But to her dismay, from the other room Sakura's mom said "Hey you know what lets go over to Ichiraku's I haven't been there in a long time"

"Ug! sigh THAT'S FINE MOM!" Sakura yelled out getting a rather loud YAY from Naruto who stood up rather violently and turned to get his coat. "Well at least he'll be happy she said to herself"

They took the rather short walk to the ramen bar and went to take their seats when the owner said "HEY Naruto your back, this is the sec"

"SHHH, do you not want me to eat here? What's wrong with you?" conveyed Naruto.

"Um Naruto, why are you talking to me like that" Sakura's mom said.

"Um, I'll be right back" Naruto said as he walked around the corner of the building to get some privacy. When he felt he was safely around the building to state his frustration out of ears shot, he did just that. "OH COME ON! This is stupid, I do so well with not lying and go and screw it all up by saying that in her face, sigh it sucks being blind. Well it's a good thing she's a little old, she probably didn't hear half of what I said."

"Does he know we can both see and hear him?" Sakura's mom said to her daughter.

"I think he meant to walk around the build so we couldn't."

"He fell about three feet short for that" said Sakura's mom. "You sure know how to pick 'em Sakura" she said nudging her.

"Hey don't say that about him" Sakura said.

"I'm just saying, you could have got someone a little bit smarter" told Sakura's mom.

"First off, he's blind so normally he wouldn't have this problem, Secondly, you're right, and third, He can be really charming, and nice when you get to know him." Sakura said as she watched Naruto now picking his nose.

"AH, I got that, I've been trying to get the fucker for a week!" he said trying to wipe it on the brick wall to what he thought was his right to his left. "HUH? Brick wall?, where are you?! BRICK WALL?! AWW you've betrayed me!!"

"Yeah we saw and heard everything Naruto" said Sakura's mom.

With slumped shoulders Naruto said "Sorry about that old comment"

"It's ok you've never even see me before" Sakura's mother said.

"Still sorry." Was all the more he could muster.

"Just sit down" she said.

With this Naruto walked over and sat down, which he though was odd placement because he sat between Sakura and her mother, but still found it rather nice that they had completely dropped the fact that he had acted like a total ass. It wasn't long after they ordered that a rather green clad ninja had found them. "Oh hello!" Lee said. This caught all of their attention as he approached them.

"Hi Lee Merry Christmas by the way." Sakura said.

"It's so good to hear you say that again Sakura, it's nice that you say that every year to me" Lee said while he got right next them.

Naruto let out a heavy, sigh at the sound of Lee's fortune.

"That reminds me Sakura I have something to ask you" Lee continued before going into a weird stance raising one fist to the air and going into thought.

It was at this point that Naruto turned to Sakura's mom and nudged her before saying " hey I bet you twenty ryu that Lee asks Sakura out"

"What?! He knows your Sakuras girlfriend right?!" She asked confused.

"Yeah, oh yeah he knows" Naruto said.

"No ones that retarded! Yeah, you know what sure you're on" she finished.

Lee then breaking from his mental; walls screams aloud "This is for you Gai sensei!!" with tears running down his face he turned to Sakura and yelled "Sakura will you go out will me!!"

"Nnnno Lee," was her response.

"You heard her, No Lee I'll kick your ass later get out of here" Naruto said in a fairly apathetic tone.

"Fair enough, enjoy the rest of your meal" Lee said before realizing the third person to their party. "Oh, my apologies, who might you be"

"I'm Sakura's mo-" She started to say but Sakura cut her off.

"Friend, Lee she's my friend" Sakura said which gained a rather confused look from her mother.

"Wow, really? You look just like Sakura, only ,much much older" Lee said in full strength getting Sakura's mom to gasp from his ballsy comment.

"Anyway, enjoy your you meal" he said as he continued on his path.

"bye Lee!" the all sort of yelled as he simply walked away as soon as he was out of hearing range the silence was destroyed.

"HOW OLD DO I LOOK?!" Sakura's mom yelled.

This was said at the same time as Naruto yelled "LEE?, YOU TOLD LEEE?!"

"Well I did say everyone" Sakura said.

"SERIOUSLY, what age do you people think I am?" the mother continued.

"YEAH but LEEEE?! WHAT THE FUCK!!" Naruto continued yelling.

"Look, I thought we were already over this" Sakura said.

"Naruto how old do you think I really am really?" The woman begged.

"Hold on, just one moment Mrs. Haruno, Lee?! I mean what part of him was better than me?" Naruto said trying to figure out this cruel twist of fate.

"I… Uh… Umm" Sakura said.

"SOUPS HERE!" the store owner said.

"AHHHHHH RAMEN!!" Naruto screamed, before saying "Huh, I guess I really do scream for the joy of soup." He broke his chopsticks and started to dig in before saying "Lee?! sigh alright, it's fine Sakura, I'm over it."

"Right" Sakura's mom said "so how old do you think I am" She said causing Naruto to cough a little as he was eating.

It was a dirty trap and he knew it. "… I'll say that your um… can I just get back to you when I can see?"

With a small quirk in her lips she said "Fine, but don't think I'll forget."

Naruto began to really eat his food as did the other two. When about halfway through his first bowls Sakura's mom said "wow you can really eat that stuff can't you kid"

"You have no idea" Sakura said a little disgusted as to how much he ate on a normal basis.

"Sakura's right, did you now I'm actually the king of ramen?" Naruto said.

"Really?" the mom said while Sakura rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, I was given a crown by someone for eating a bowl in less than thirty seconds" Naruto said proudly. "But SOMEONE threw it away" he said while casting a disapproving glance at Sakura.

"It was a bowl that you gave yourself and put on your head!" Sakura said getting louder at the end.

"I'm someone!" Naruto yelled back.

"Hey kid" the shop keeper yelled.

"yeah?" Naruto said back.

"Thirty seconds huh? I've got a challenge for you" he continued.

"What is it?" Naruto said.

"If you can eat a whole bowl in say… fifteen seconds you guys's entire meal is free."

"REALLY?"

"consider it a Christmas present for my number one customer if you win" He said with a smile on his face.

"Ok bring on the bowl!" Naruto said getting ready.

A few moments passed and the bowl was place in front of Naruto who stuck one finger in it to make sure that it wasn't too hot, after assuring that it would not burn him, he lifted the bowl to his mouth took a deep breath. He began to drink in the soupy goodness and fast.

"ONE! TWO! THREE!" everyone else counted in unison as they watched in amazement at the self proclaimed kings powers of consumption. "SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE!..."

"BAHHH!" the boy said gasping for air after finishing the whole thing off in nine seconds. "YES! I AM THE KING!!" he said while slapping the bowl on his head.

"Wow, how can he do that?" the mom said.

"Well… I am eating for tw" Naruto said but was quickly cut off.

"If you say another word…" Sakura said.

With that he slumped his head down before Sakura continued " And take that bowl off your head."

"Yes, Sakura-chan" he said taking it off and ordering another bowl.

After an internal snicker Sakura's mom thought internally "Wow, they act just like a married couple… Oh, my gosh they do" a little shocked, she actually let a grin slip past her lips, thinking that maybe he was actually just the right person for he daughter to be with, Even if it was a little early, and a bit of a rough start.

After another staggering dosage of ramen and a big thank you to the shop owner they left all three of them quite full and Naruto with twenty extra bucks in his pocket. After arriving at the house Sakura broke out her Christmas spirit again when she remembered presents.

"PRESENETS!!" she screamed pulling them both into the living room to open them as quickly as possible.

"Calm down Sakura, we should let out guest open his up first huh? What do you say." The mother said sitting down.

"Oh, yeah here" Sakura said grabbing both present and handing it to him.

"Ooooh thank you." He said grabbing the smaller box and opening it.

"It's from my mom" Sakura said.

After opening the box fully he began to speak "Um… I'm sure glad that you thought of me but… I'm sorry but what is it?"

"OH, it's a headband polishing kit, I told my mom the story about how much you care for that think and she bought it for you."

"Oh, thank you, Yeah I'll use this all the time thank you!" Naruto said placing it to his side and grabbing hold of the larger box. He opened it and felt inside to feel a rather comfy piece of clothing.

"Here, I'll help you put it on, it's from me" she grabbed the coat from the box and placed on his person.

He felt the coat noticing it was a little weird like something mentally clicked with this coat.

"Notice anything strange?" Sakura asked.

As he ran his hand over it to try and get a picture as to what it really was he said "Wait! this isn't?"

"Uhuh! It's an enlarged version of you old coat" Sakura said happily.

"Awesome, it's exactly like it"

"It's bright orange" the mom said staring at it thinking it was probably wrong.

"It's perfect!" he said reaching up and grabbing at the white puffy collar.

"Thank you soo much Sakura it's awesome"

"Your welcome she said sitting back down." She said sitting back down. "OOOH, now lets open your presents."

"Yeah I'm interested in that to." He said wondering how they would react.

"Here mom open yours first" Sakura said.

"sure" she said reaching over to grab it, and sat back down to open the package. First the paper then the box, and finally she set gaze upon the item. "…" she stared at it and removed it from the packed for her daughter to see. Which immediately caused her daughter to gasp.

"Yeah found that in store and thought you could use it" Naruto said

"How old am I?!" the mother said holding a bed pan from which came from the package.

"Huh?" Naruto said.

"It's freaking bed pan Naruto" Sakura said.

"WHAT?! NO! AWW CRAP I'M SORRY, I DIDN'T KNOW!!" Naruto pleaded.

"…" the mother paused and closed her eyes trying not to rip him a new one. "It… it's ok…" she said, "But if I get called old one more someone is going to pay"

"Sorry, really, Sakura why don't you open your present" he said trying to change the subject.

"I'll be right back, don't bother waiting for me though I'm just grabbing something" the mom said walking out of the room seeming a little disturbed at the current turn of events.

"Go ahead Sakura open yours" Naruto said rubbing his forehead trying to get over what just happened.

"OOOooooh" She said ripping the top of the package open. She looked at the clothing inside and pulled it out gasping at this gifts power.

"Do you like it?" Naruto asked.

She just stared at the gift saying nothing as her mother entered the room setting down a rather large bowl on the table next to her and looking at them to try and see the gift which just about made her shit her pants. Both mother and daughters eye were bulging out of their head at the sight of the slutty little crotch-less lingerie. "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?!" Sakura's mom screamed.

"It's just a little clothing I thought Sakura might like?! What wrong with it?!" Naruto said confused.

"NOTHING IF YOU'RE A FILTHY PERVERT!!" She screamed back furiously.

"WHAT? What are you talk about" Naruto said standing to his feet.

"I'll kill you if you don't get away from my daughter that's what I'm talking about!" Sakura's mom said walking towards him quickly.

"Wait mom!" Sakura said getting in-between them.

"I don't get it is there something on the clothes or something?!"

"MOM stop" Sakura said stopping her mother. "He didn't even know what the gift was, he was blind when he got it, and had someone helping him."

"Yeah probably that perverted teacher of his!" Sakura's mom said.

"No, actually… it was one of our old teammates… who was completely inept at things like this." Sakura said.

"What is wrong with those clothes?!" Naruto asked trying to figure out the situation.

With that the mother knew that her daughter was actually telling the truth, and gave up on trying to kill him, but was still quite stressed after this turn of events and had only one thought to try and get a hold of this situation. "I need some eggnog" she said walking back over to the bowl she set down earlier.

Sakura turned around and whispered into Naruto's ear "It's lingerie"

His reaction was that of shock and understanding. "I had no idea" was all that that he was able to say.

"I don't think your stupid enough to try and actually give that to her in front of me on purpose so lets just try and forget that for now, come on try some of this eggnog wont you?"

Sakura cringed at the sound of it. Naruto also faced a degree of panic, because after her pride was revealed to be false from dinner, there was no way she would fake it again for this drink.

"I agree" Naruto said as he took a glass of the putrid smelling drink. The mom downed one cup, and turned to him.

"Well drink up" Sakura's mom said.

Naruto pulled it to his lips and it indeed did smell quite foul, but was not longer in the mood to take any chances, when it came to screwing this evening up any further, and decided that no matter how it tasted, it was good. He opened his mouth and took a small drink of the fluid.

"please be good" he thought.

"This is really…" Naruto said. " really… quite good" he actually found the substance to be quiote delicious in fact.

"Really? Not many people other than me seem to like it" she said downing her glass as he did the same.

"No this is good, it taste like… well actually I'm not sure what it taste like but it still great." He said scooping himself another glass from the bowl.

"Hey, looks like I found someone else who really likes this recipe Cheers!" the mom said raising and clicking her glass to his as the both took another big drink and proceeded to grab one more cup. While Sakura stared in disbelief as he actually enjoyed it, but then remembered one disturbing thing.

"Wait! Naruto stop, it… has…" she said quietly being ignored as the other two now both happily laughed over some corny joke grabbing yet another glass "it has liquor in it." she said under her breathe slumping her head because there was no longer any point in trying to stop them.

Thirty five minutes later and things were getting pretty bad. Sakura the only one who hadn't touched the eggnog was now trying to keep to completely drunk people from make entire asses of themselves.

"Naruto you dirty dog, you probably knew that was some kind of sexy underwear the whole time" the mom said slurring her words.

"No, I didn't! hic if I had I certainly wouldn't have given to her in front of you" Naruto said causing both of them to laugh.

"Hey, have you seen these baby pictures of Sakura" the mom said handing him a picture.

"No! mom not that!" Sakura said completely embarrassed.

"No! I gotta see these" Naruto said grabbing the picture and waiting for a second. "OH! Yeah, I'll have to take a rain check burp es'cuse me, for now I still kinda can't see."

"Right well, I can just tell you what they look like, here" The mom said but was stopped by Sakura who was realizing that this wasn't going to be good for her if she stayed any longer.

"Hold up, Look at the time mom, we have to go, it's already so late" Sakura said, trying to fix this current situation.

"It's is? Oh well I guess you two better be going then, it's really too bad too. There's still another bowl of eggnog. I guess I'll have to take care of it myself" The mom said standing up and sort wobbling before catching herself.

"Oh, no mom it's much too late for that you should just go to bed" Sakura said.

"Really?! Well I guess I should then" Sakuras mom said.

"Come one Naruto, ok well were going to be leaving now mom, goodbye for now" Sakura said grabbing Naruto.

"Ok well goodnight you two" the mom said walking into the back of the house, while they made their way to the front door. Naruto yelled a loud bye as the exited the house and started to make their way home.

About halfway there Sakura found herself more or less carrying her boyfriend as he leaned on her heavily, he was now really feeling the effects of the alcohol.

"Naruto would you quit dragging your feet" she asked trying to get him to carry his own weight.

"Sure Sakura-chan I…" he said before pausing in his steps.

"What is it?" she said.

But his only answer was not words, but vomit which found it's way all over Sakura's leg.

"Ewww, it's all over me! I hate vomit" she said kneeling over to make sure he was ok.

Naruto, didn't know what it was, but for as long as he could remember there was something in him, an urge, that just told him, puke tastes good, normally he would be able to override this opinion but in his current state he just could seem to help it.

"Sakura if you want me to… I'll eat it off of you" he said trying to act like this was something sexy.

"that is one of the cutest and most disgusting things I have ever heard. But that is only because you have that fox in you, otherwise, that's just gross." she said but slowly started to realize something. "You know somewhere between the terrible presents, and drinking, you actually did a decent job tonight, and it's probably because you won't remember it in the morning, but I've gotta say…. I love you Naruto-kun" she said getting not much of a response out of him which is about what she expected. Before a disturbing fact dawned on her as she kneeled there next to him on his hands and knees in the snow. "What are you? AWWWW!! Stop trying to eat that!! come on we're going" she said dragging him to his feet, to which he immediately fell back down and started puking again. She kneeled back down again saying "get it out, get it out." and patting him on the back.

Somewhere outside the village, a rather frantic person could be heard screaming. It just happened to be Shikamaru. "LET ME OUT OF THE BARREL, COME ON PLEASE, WAIT! NO, STAY AWAY FROM ME, GET OUT OF THE BARREL, NO! LEAVE ME IN THE BARREL NO NOOO!!"


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Notes to you: Hmmhmm mmm, uh, k so it's been a while, but I'm out here drinking tea, and IT'S FUCKING DONE not the story just the chapter… And I'm not gonna pretend to be in some kind of fantasy world where I can predict exactly when the next chapter is going to come out, BUT as I have said before I WILL FINISH, as mind you over the past 9 months I CONSTANLY thought of this story and actually writing the chapter. Either way love from the War Machines, Crimson Azure and Saffron, ENJOY the new chapter. And yes I still read your comments.

The return to the beginning

"Wake up Naruto" Sakura said incredibly loud.

"MMMMMmmmmm" Naruto groaned a little pissed off at her screaming.

"Wake up we can't just sleep all day" she said again just as loud.

"why are you yelling sakura?!" he said back to her.

"I'm… not I'm whispering?" she said.

He sat up to find that his head was throbbing and that he had felt the worst he had felt in his entire life.

"Owww my friggin head" he said putting it in between his hands.

"Are you ok?" she asked walking over and sitting on the bed next to him"

"I feel… sick…"

"Well that's to be expected you did drink A LOT last night." She said a little pissed off at him

"I did?" he said lifting his head from his hands

"Yeah, In fact I would say that were probably in trouble with my mom for doing that… but then again she was the one the kept pushing you to drink more wasn't she"

"I drank with your mom?!?"

"Yeah what did you think was in the eggnog last night."

"I don't know… egg? Whatever the fuck 'nog' is?!?"

"Try liquor…"

"That's right" he said remembering more and more of exactly what had happened the night before. "I… like your mom"

"Maybe a little more than for your own good"

"well how much did I drink last night" he asked finding the certain chunk of memory he would never be able to remember.

"well between the two of you? you probably finished two bowls"

"huh…" he said trying bring himself together to get on with his day, he smacked his mouth together a couple of times before continuing "… my mouth tastes good… did we make out?"

"GROSakura!!! Wait?! Does my mouth really taste like that?! Maybe I should brush my teeth more often" she said becoming more self conscious.

"Don't… it tastes just the way I like it…now, can I get a kiss" he said trying to sound slightly sexy while pulling her a little close"

"NO" she said pushing him away as she stood up. "You have to brush your teeth first"

"ok… but… I still. Feel like crap" he said lying back down.

"… come on get up" she said grabbing his hand and pulling him to his feet.

"Sakura no I really…" he said stopping and grabbing his mouth" … where's the bathroom I'm gonna…" he said scrambling to the door with her help.

After a few minutes he opened the door back up and said "your right I need to brush my teeth"

"You feel any better?" she asked.

"Not really" he said sitting back down on the bed.

"Well I'm hungry and not really interested in eating instant ramen so get ready" she said pulling him back to his feet.

"Your right Sakura…"

"No-" she said being cut off.

"Instant is no comparison"

"NO!!-"

"TO" He started to yell.

"NO I'm not going to" she said being cut off one more time.

"ICHIRAKU'S!!! you took the words right out of my mouth Sakura, let's go" He said shaking his hangover off almost instantly (thought not actually).

Sakura lowered her shoulders a little depressed "I'll grab my coat" she said.

At Tsunade's house she awakens to a very shaky feeling, "What is this?" she asks herself, "It seems so… familiar" She continues trying to shake off the feeling in her bones, She got up to see a note from Shizune reminding her that the Kazekage is in town for a meeting. "Hmm some things just not right today" she tells herself.

After a short walk where Naruto wanted really bad to make a complaint about it being really bright outside because of his hangover, he found himself sitting down at the ramen bar. Slouching down on his seat he ordered his meal.

"I don't know how you think you're gonna handle that after throwing up from just waking up" Sakura said.

He shrugged off her comment and grabbed the bowl in front of him as it was set down. And with one sip he felt instantly cured. He began to scarf the whole bowl to Sakura's surprise.

"How do you do that Naruto?" she asked grabbing her bowl and digging in as well.

After a few bowls of the delicious substance the conversation began to turn towards the events of last night.

"Now I know what to do." Naruto said setting the half eaten bowl of ramen on the counter.

"for what?" Sakura asked.

"for the next time I'm drinking with your mom, I mean this stuff just heals everything." He said not being able to see her growing rage over the comment. "And for that matter, I've gotta meet the rest of your family, because I bet your family reunions are just awesome, I mean everybody has to be drun-" CRACK!!!

Sakura had hit him, and hard, Probably the hardest she had hit him since earlier that week when she had blinded him. It felt satisfying "NARUTO!!! YOU STUPID IDIOT!!! HOW DENSE CAN YOU BE!?! You are NOT drinking with my mother again! Gosh! do you even have any… Naruto?" she asked looking down at his face still just sitting in a half filled bowl of ramen not moving. "NARUTO?!? Crap I didn't just blind you again did I?!?" she asked yanking his head from the bowl.

"AWESOME!" Naruto said.

"Awesome what?" Sakura said.

"You have no idea how this feels, The ramen it's so delicious and yeah I'll be the first to admit it burns a little in my eyes but its ok when you get used it."

"Huuh, it's a good thing your so stupid Naruto" Sakura said relaxing.

"What the burning means it's working!' Naruto said. Its healing my eyes.

"Whatever, but either way we can't leave those wet bandages on" Sakura said getting up from her chair and putting her coat back on.

"Wait WHAT you mean I actually?!" Naruto asked happily.

"Come on we're going to the hospital" She trying to get him from his seat.

"Wait I wanna finish this bowl first"

"IT'S HAD YOUR FACE IN IT COME ON!"

"BUT it's still good! So what if it has a little hair in it. IT ADDS FLAVOR" he yelled as she dragged him away.

It was weird making the same exact walk to the hospital from the ramen shop again, still holding hands, Naruto still blind. Sakura remembered the day that she first had to do this and though that it was sort of funny when you look back on it.

"hey Naruto?" Sakura said

"Yeah," he replied.

"Remember the first time we made this walk?"

"Yeah this is just like that day isn't it" he said.

"Mmhm," she agreed as the continued to walk slowly.

"Hey, but at least this is the first trip to the hospital today huh?"

"Yeah, I was so worried when you first got your eye knocked out"

"YOU WERE WORRIED!? I was seeing your face and the floor!" Naruto said rubbing the eye that fell out.

"Oh I bet that was weird"

"I had nightmares of that for a little bit" he said.

"Speaking of nightmares remember when you freaked out thinking my mom was gonna kill you, in the middle of the night."

"Yeah, I just didn't think I could control myself until you stepped in and set me straight" Naruto said. "AND OH my gosh!, do you remember how much trouble we had at first, Especially when you were in the shower"

"Lets try not to remember that one ok" Sakura said but was interrupted in her head by her inner self saying "Oh I'll remember!" to which Sakura smiled a little. "Man that was so funny what you did to Hinata at first with the eye, you just about killed her"

"HA, oh yeah that was great… then I bitch slapped her… then screamed in her face" he said getting more serious "Wow I got to apologize to her"

"Yeah… well we're here"

"Wow that seems a lot shorter when your not in agonizing pain"

"But aren't you" she asked.

"Not it's only a slight burn"

The doctors at the hospital had an interesting expression the moment they walked in "SAKURA!!! Awww Naruto…"

"Oh come on" Naruto said "What have I ever really done to you guys?"

To which one doctor responded "I'm on break"

Whilst one more doctor found himself looking as he was abandoned before saying "crap… come on"

They led him and Sakura to a back room where he sat down. On the bench when the doctor looked over the charts before letting out a rather loud and victorious "YES, the hokage is supposed to take care of this personally, I just go get her" he said before skipping down the hall gleefully.

"Sakura" Naruto said, in the silence.

"yeah i know you'll finally get to see me again how sweet" she replied with a bit of a unenthusiastic tone to his voice.

"WHAT NO I'LL GET TO SEE EVERYTHING, the village the hokage mountain, ramen…" he said before realizing his folly "Uh, and YOU TOO?!?! I mean yeah of course you… that, that other stuff… was… a joke… HA ha… get it… I'm sorry"

with a tinge of anger in her voice she said " Yeah funny…"

"NO really I'm sorry" Naruto responded

"Just forget it… it's ok" she said before the hokage entered the room.

"OK so what happened he get ramen in his eyes" she said jokingly. But their silence said it all,"PFHA HA HA, oh shot in the dark hmm" ok so lets take those bandages off."

She begins to unwrap his eyes taking off the bandages before saying " I havn't had lunch yet and I gotta say it smells pretty good, OK now how many fingers am I holding up" she said.

"HUH?!? WHAT!!! I CAN'T SEE I'M BLIND!!!" he began to scream.

"Now Sakura" the hokage said as Sakura turned on the light switch.

Cascades of light began to pour in Naruto's poor little eyes… Then it was instantly more like flame throwers scorching his retinas. "GAHHH MY EYES!!!!" He screamed grasping his face, and falling over.

After a brief, but good laugh from their cruel practical joke, the hokage asked " so really how many finger am I holding up now"

"I don't know but I know one finger that I am holding up to you!!" he said giving the hokage the bird while sitting back up. His eyes gradually adjusted to the light before he looked and sure enough he said "Three! Are you happy now."

"Oh, you would have done the same thing," she replied

"Yeah I would now, And don't think I won't remember this, you'll get your comeuppance"

"That'll be the day, Doctor Naruto That like an Oxy moron" The hokage said.

"YOU'RE A MORON!!" He replied.

"Nope, he's just a regular one…" Sakura said.

"Sakura" Naruto said turning his gaze towards her and getting caught in and instant eye lock. To witch both of them responded with a few seconds of silence instant blushing and a sharp look away. "It's… it's good to see you Sakura…"

"Yeah, I mean I saw you the whole time but… thank you…"

"AWWW that's cute" the hokage said. To witch they both got even redder.

"Thanks for ruining the moment" Naruto said.

"OH ANYTIME, however I have a bit of good news your eyes are fine, so in lieu of more bandages your free to go." The hokage said

"WHAT YOU MEAN I CAN GO!!! AWESOME!!!" He said jumping to his feet.

"Hopefully we see each other on better terms after this" The hokage said.

" YAY!!! Come on Sakura lets go." He said taking her hand as they both walked out the door, before realizing, that was it, They were no longer bound to each other by the hand. So they let go. "I guess we can just go our separate ways" Naruto said.

"WELLL," The hokage said walking up behind them "Your technically both off for another day… And I really don't feel like changing the roster, It's a bit of paper work, so if you wanna spend one more night together, I won't tell anyone if you don't." said the hokage winking.

"no one is as perverted as you old lady" Naruto said but was interrupted by Sakura.

"Jiraya."

"Well either way I'm not doing the paper work so however you wanna go about it" the hokage said before walking off to the back of the hospital.

Sakura and Naruto exited the hospital, and walked out a few feet before Naruto started to say " So Saku-" but was cut off by Sakura.

"Is that Gara?!" she said.

"huh?" he said turning around to see that the kazekage indeed was walking down the street, who had caught Sakura pointing out and decided to have a chat.

"Naruto is that you?" Gara said in his low apathetic voice.

"YEAH hey Gara how are you?" Naruto said.

Now in the past year Gara had made a significant stride in becoming a normal person, well as least a significant stride for Gara, which only meant that all the more he changed was that he told a joke once in a while… and not well. "Well I'm not killing people today…" he said drawing out the end of his sentence somehow making him sound even more evil than before.

"Was… was that… a joke?" Sakura asked.

Gara becoming slightly depressed said under his voice "Why does everyone have to ask that… Yes, yes it was."

"K… No more jokes Gara, but what are you even doing here" Naruto said.

"I have a meeting with the hokage… Oh Naruto, I have a new jutsu, wanna see it" he said in an attempt to make up for his tasteless joke.

"Sure, I guess, fire away" he said getting a little distance between them.

Gara raise his sand shield in a flurry and made it form into little soft sand spikes whirling around him before yelling "BLINDING SAND!!!" arcing the beam of sand straight into Naruto's eyes.

"FUUUUUUUCKKK!!!" was Naruto's only response.


	9. Update

HI GUYS!!!!! I know it's been a while, and I plan to get back into the action, well at least finish my one story. My life has turned crazy and is about to flip upside down, (… fresh prince I know) but it's no less true. So I don't have the chapter yet but I am letting you all know that I am working on it, and it should be done soon. (Hopefully I can get back to regular updates)

I FREAKIN LOVE YOU GUYS

thecrimsonwarmachine


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